Today, I learned that instead of training my cat, she has been training me. She now refuses to drink anything but running tap water, and yowls loudly early in the morning at my bedroom door to be fed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my cat refuses to drink from any source of water that isn't the toilet. FML
Today, my only day off this week, my cat decided that she wanted feeding at 5am and wouldn’t stop meowing till I filled up her bowl. She then refused to eat it. FML
Today, my cat learned how to open doors. Ever since then she's been running up to my room, opening my door, and running away. My cat is playing ding-dong ditch. FML
Today, I tried to train my cat to scratch the scratching post by giving her a treat every time she used it, but she took that as getting a treat every time she scratched something. Now, not only does she scratch all my furniture, but she also meows for a treat while doing it. FML
Today my cat watched me clean and refill his water bowls, then shoved his fresh-out-of-the-litter-box paw in my glass of water. FML
Today, my cat learned the hard way what the bathtub is for. While I was in it. FML
Today, my parents decided to "discipline" my kitten by spraying her with water. This somehow managed to completely un-train her, and now she's back to being the compulsive biter she was when I first brought her home. FML
Today, my mom read online you could train cats to relieve themselves in the toilet. Without reading any further, she took away the litter tray. My house reeks of cat piss and shit, and she still refuses to give the cat its litter tray back, insisting it'll work eventually. FML
Today, my incredibly needy rescue cat - who knows she doesn't get to go into my bedroom at night - decided that she needed to wail and scratch the bedroom door from midnight until 5 a.m. Now that I'm awake, she's ignoring me because she knows I'm mad at her. FML
Today, I found out why my girlfriend has been angry with me ever since I moved in with her. Apparently, she is pissed that I taught her cat how to play fetch and keep treating him like a dog. FML
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Top comments
zingline89 18
Pussy whipped
Il_Maestro 6
I prefer elephants. They paint you pictures, share your love for peanuts, can carry you around effortlessly, and can even spray you with water on hot days. Besides, no one will pick a fight with you. That bumper sticker that says "Bitch, I have an elephant" tells everyone that you mean business.
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Comments (137)
J1hill33 12
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
That's why dogs are better.
Il_Maestro 6
I prefer elephants. They paint you pictures, share your love for peanuts, can carry you around effortlessly, and can even spray you with water on hot days. Besides, no one will pick a fight with you. That bumper sticker that says "Bitch, I have an elephant" tells everyone that you mean business.
kj51 5
What a pussy
KM96 24
Yep ... Everyone just owns a elephant these days ... But in my country, a trainer of an elephant just got killed. So maybe not the best option
wlddog 14
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Cats are evil
golferman72 16
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Yea. Just get rid of it. Who likes cats anyway?
chemchic 7
I love my dogs and I will never enjoy being around cats since I'm severely allergic. I automatically think dogs are better but I haven't spent any time around cats so I guess my reasoning is biased :)
kyarush 10
I hate cats.. Can't trust em'!
J1hill33 12
23- I guess you're right. Some cats can be worse than others.
ohSNAPyall 27
His name was Stampy. You loved him.
mariah_victoria 0
Shut. Up. Omfg. >
duckiegirl21 10
Everyone know Quagmire loves cats...and pussy! Giggity!
zingline89 18
Pussy whipped
taybabaylover 1
now That cat has a personality
ComTlancy 12
Dogs have masters while cats have staff
Il_Maestro 6
Sounds like me. Except instead of running tap water, it's beer.
ummmhii 0
My cat does the EXACT same thing.
RussianFox 13
What can I say? We love our running tap water.
A83_fml 18
So does mine, it's a fricking conspiracy.
OneLittleAdditio 9
ugh I hate cats. dogs are so much better. they show people that they care :)
longview_fml 0
Cats do that too! Well, my cat do. :) I think cats are better than dogs! But that's my opinion..
OneLittleAdditio 9
Thank you for not going off on me :) Maybe I just give off a bad vibe with cats. my experience with dogs has always been better.
Roevera 14
Dogs are pretty awesome, but you'd have to be a dedicated cat owner to really see the good in cats. =]
l23VIVE 17
Twenty nine just earned my respect... Though i prefer cats over dogs because cats (well unless it's my cat Ranger) don't bark at people and keep me up all night
truth_spitta 0
41, your cat barks? O.o Anyways...a lot of people dont like cats because 9/10 times (yes I'm making a generalization) you have to get the cat when it is a kitten and raise it and earn its love and affection rather then just getting it from the start
sprinklecakes 4
66 that's not true at all... You can earn the love and affection of a cat any age
aleeshttylXD 9
one time i was walking my dog to my aunts house (which is only like, 10 houses away,) and she was unleashed, a cat decided to run over to my dog and attack her. i hate them now.
Silverangel007 3
Lol, you just gave me one reason to like dogs! I'm not fond of that knock on the door followed by "are you saved?". Though i'm still not sold on either of those pets.
whatnow430 15
Sounds familiar...
I_Punch_Babies 7
you know how it goes. dogs are supposed to serve us. cats are supposed to be served by us.
maliki32 7
YDI for getting a cat!
usor_name 11
This sounds like a FML that my mom might write.
blcksocks 19
You're the kitty's new bitch
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Looks like ima have to throw some cats. -Crazy Cat Lady
joeymo304 9
Get a goldfish
Nevereverland 8
Man i'd rather have a pet rock than having a goldfish.
SkoomaKi 28
^ You and Patrick Star would be good friends.
Nevereverland 8
We're great friends are pets go to the same park :)