Today, I overheard my boyfriend saying to his friends, "I never knew what real contraception was until I saw Laura's face." I'm Laura. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I heard my boyfriend of 3 months talking with his friend, not knowing I could hear them. "Tonight's the night," my boyfriend says. "I'm finally going to tell her I love her!" I got really excited, deciding i loved him too. Then his friend says, "Awesome! But what about Kayla?" I'm Kayla. FML
Today, a client stared at me in disbelief after I mentioned that I had a boyfriend. FML
Today, I told a guy that I was on birth control. He decided that it would be best for us not to continue speaking with each other. I never would've thought taking care of myself would be a deal breaker. FML
Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his friends as his "sex partner." FML
Today, I discovered my boyfriend has been slipping me abortion pills to "supplement" my regular birth control. FML
Today, I was introduced to friends of my boyfriend as, "My other girlfriend." FML
Today, I found out that my long-distance boyfriend just got married because his "real" girlfriend is pregnant. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's grandmother's house meeting her for the first time. I excused myself to the restroom and as I walked out of the room I heard her say, "You could do a lot better. She's fat." Then I heard my boyfriend reply, "I know." FML
Today, I went to visit my boyfriend at work. That's where I met his pregnant girlfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me out to meet his friends. It was going really well until I left to use the bathroom and two of the girls with us came in and started talking about how creepy Matt's new girlfriend is and that they're happy he's going to dump her. My boyfriend is Matt. FML
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Top comments
jmfreee 16
Sounds like real contraception is his attitude.
Meggston 17
That's rude! You should confront him. But as a general rule. Don't date boys who think it's cool to be mean to you for their friends. They're not worth it.
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Comments (75)
The_4th_Doctor 13
Sounds like he's trying to compensate for something.. acting like a huge dick to make up for his tiny one.
rdenkewicz 11
Maybe he likes putting it in your mouth.
fantasyworld 39
I hope you dumped him.
DanielleinDC 34
What an ass. I hope you dumped the obnoxious prick.