Today, I opened a window that had been shut for a couple of months. As soon as I did, dozens of tiny baby spiders blew in with the breeze, and dispersed in my kitchen. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I decided to bring down a very old fan from the attic. I plugged it in, and as soon as I turned it on, tiny spiders were blown all over my room. FML
Today, after having a 3-day vacation and feeling a bit bummed that it was over, I got home to find a black widow watching her babies hatch in my office window. FML
Today, I was reaching into the floor vent in my toddler's room to retrieve some toys she'd dropped. What I found instead was a clump of large dead spiders. FML
Today, I got up and started getting ready for work. As I entered the bathroom, I noticed a moth in the shower. Feeling generous, I caught the moth in a cup and took it to the front porch. I released the moth and watched it fly away… into a giant spider and its web. FML
Today, I was going to set up my air conditioner in the window. As I opened up the window, I must have disturbed a wasp nest, because a dozen wasps flew in and several of them stung me. The rest are now somewhere in my house with my terrified girlfriend. FML
Today, I noticed a little white ball in the corner of my bedroom ceiling. I guess it had been there for a while already, but the teeming mass of baby spiders crawling out made it a lot more conspicuous. FML
Today, some spider must have had babies somewhere in the walls, because every five minutes I seem to find yet another spider on my ceiling, in my cupboards, under the furniture, everywhere. I’m so fed up of smashing them, I’m thinking of getting the house fumigated. FML
Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML
Today, I saw a moth trapped in a spider web. Feeling gracious, I gently freed it, and then took it to the window to let it out. When I opened the window to set him free, my $300 air conditioner fell two stories and smashed on the sidewalk. The moth flew away. FML
Today, the spiders in my house are so big that they catch wasps in their webs. FML
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Top comments
SalsaVerdeDonut 22
I'll bring the gasoline. You just bring the matches.
MagnusDeus 24
Nope
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Comments (94)
aimbug 42
You poor thing! I would have probably screamed and hid outside while someone else took care of the problem!
Kitty_Kat16 16
Omg i would probably move but seriously buy some sort of bug killer and spray it evreywhere
Emmaray 16
"Tiny baby" had me thinking aww cute... but "spiders" quickly brought on the HELL no. I'm sorry OP. I'm sorry about the many sleepless nights that await you.
MasterTron 24
And the itsy bitsy spider crawled in to mamas bed and bit hubby in the head.
Lalala579121 28
I dunno, spiders are pretty cute. The way they look at you with all those adorable little eyes while they feast on your soul.
OfficialEarth 12
Do you have enough gasoline or do we need to start a GoFundMeNow?
arano 29
Time to burn down the house. I've got your back for an alibi. For, you know, insurance purposes.
meg13rocks 26
I just hope they didn't blow AT you.
OhSnapItsSkyla 19
so much nope in one post
lukian_fml 29
Three strikes you're out. It was funny the first time and acceptable the second - "tiny little hopes" - but you've struck out.
lysx84 24
I had a similar issue - opened a window that happened to break a wasps nest. Not fun. I'd take the wasps over the spiders any day though!!
Catlover1130 14
Uh both are huge NOPES for me lmao
fmlperson8264 16
But wasps can fly and they can sting you. I think they're scarier than spiders.
tbro47 23
Wasps are bigger and a lot easier to hunt down though. Spiders are tiny and tend to hide in dark small spaces so I'd be afraid of putting on my shoes. You can never be sure if you got them all either, the damn things multiply.
iam_mari 1
OP I'm screaming for you
vikky538 29
Its halloween time. Spiders are one of the most needed items for decorations