Today, I'm on vacation in Japan with my brother. When he said he could speak Japanese, I guess what he really meant that he's a dumbass weeaboo who only knows the words "kawaii", "baka", "sugoi" and a few others. He ended up offending two locals so much that they beat the shit out of us. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while on vacation, my brother asked a native of the area for help. Once he got it, he thanked them with "Muchos gracias" in the best Spanish accent he could do. We're in Japan. FML
Today, I almost got written up for insubordination by my boss. All I did was explain to him that I couldn't help a tourist out because I speak Japanese, not Korean, and that it's not in fact "the same Asian shit" as he seemed to think. FML
Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. While under the influence of the drugs, I tried to speak Japanese. Later, my Japanese roommate informed me that I was saying "I am a weasel" over and over again. FML
Today, my brother thought it'd be hilarious to tease a group of Pokémon players. They thought it'd be hilarious to beat both our asses. FML
Today, while on a vacation, I tried to step out of myself and flirt with this boy who I thought was cute. He was going along with it and nodding so I thought it was working. Then he opened his mouth and I realized he didn't speak English. FML
Today, I found out that the nickname my friend has been calling me in Japanese for the past year is the word for "Idiot". FML
Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his parents. My boyfriend is Japanese, and I wanted to introduce myself in Japanese so I'd asked him. Little did I know he'd taught me how to say, "Hello, I love your son's cock." I almost got kicked out of their house. FML
Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML
Today, I was verbally abused by a tourist because neither I nor anyone else in my country can speak "proper English". We're in England - clue's in the name, dipshit. FML
Today, my grandpa who is staying with us mistook me for a Japanese soldier and started to hit me with a bat. This is the second night in a row. FML
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Top comments
SoulEaterSE 23
Someone watched too much anime
Emma1562 35
Your brother sounds like a dumbass
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Comments (103)
sailorkristina 11
He must have said something really bad -- Japanese people don't usually do that
OrganicSistah 17
You're not even going to tell us what those words mean??
YesIAmPlease 4
Kawaii = Cute Baka = Stupid Sugoi = Amazing(I'm not 100% sure I'm right with this one.)
sadistmonkey 19
Actual Japanese speaker here. You're basically correct. I'm impressed that the OP's brother pissed Japanese people off so much that they actually beat them up.
AmIReallyRenee 20
Instead of watching so much anime, he should get real and get himself some rosetta stone
sirrubberduckie 37
Rosetta Stone is basically a scam, unless you think you're going to need to say "the boys are drinking juice in the kitchen" and other nonsense like that, on your trip to a foreign country. And you won't have pictures, multiple choice, and process of elimination to fall back on, either.
DoomedGemini 38
Truthfully I am trying to learn Japanese, and watching anime in sub can help somewhat However that should NOT be how you learn it. I was always told when trying to learn languages, watch things in that language along with your classes to try to help.
catherinecas 30
And reading books in the language of at all possible! I read Jurassic Park in French and it improved my vocabulary tons
alex_gen 39
Gomenasai
Shmatterhorn 38
Your brother must have found the wrong group to have pissed off. Maybe he needs to lay off of the anime and read an English to Japanese phrase book.
Cristian151 12
He not koo
mrslegume 8
Wow, for you guys to actually make a Japanese person angry enough to get physical, especially with foreigners, it must have been bad. Unless you almost never have contact with your brother, how could you not know he wasn't fluent? Next time, bring a basic translation phrase book.
Ninjerman 7
That's quite an accomplishment actually!!
Tomore 3
日本に行く前、日本語を勉強するべきだろう。
lailahel 6
そうだよね。
katina1236 20
Okay so to paraphrase here he knows kawaii so cute, Baka meaning idiot or several other words along those lines and sugoi meaning either awful or awesome. Well you're screwed good luck op, and remember you only have to outrun your brother