Today, I lost the remote control to my TV. I can't change the channel manually on it, and the channel it's stuck on is currently playing an infomercial for the Pos-T-Vac penis pump. I've been watching this for an hour now. I'm a female, and I'm beginning to feel like I need this product. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I came home to find my dog had not only shredded my favorite couch cushion but had also attempted to eat the TV remote. I have no idea how to change the channel manually. It looks like I'll be watching Animal Planet forever. FML
Today, I was trying to lower the volume on my TV, but nothing was happening. I got increasingly frustrated, smacking the remote and yelling at the screen. My brain finally woke up when I realized I was holding the air conditioning remote and had been turning my living room into a freezer instead. FML
Today, I was watching ESPN. My boyfriend came in, bitched about "boring tv," so I handed him the remote. He put on a Lifetime movie. I must be the only woman in America with this problem. FML
Today, I hit rock bottom; I watched one of those shitty infomercial channels, without even being forced into it at gunpoint. Even worse is that I practically creamed myself over a damn fruit juicer, all because it was 50% off and I could actually afford it. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were up late watching TV when an infomercial for "Male enhancement" came on. As I grabbed my phone, my girlfriend said, "Oh honey, don't buy that, it's okay that you're small." I was checking my voicemails. FML
Today, I put on a porno, trying to unwind after a bad day. Ten minutes in, I was so pissed off with the girl constantly repeating "You like that? Yeah?" and the cameraman's obsession with the guy's ass crack that I started yelling at the screen. Now I'm more stressed than ever. FML
Today, I was taking advantage of an empty house to try and re-spark my sex drive. Despite my best efforts, I got bored and started watching something else, but when my housemate returned suddenly, I panicked - gave a guilty shout and fumbled my dick away as I changed the monitor over - back to porn. FML
Today, I was lying on my recliner watching TV when I dropped the remote under the footrest. I got down on my hands and knees and pushed the footrest into the chair. The moment I touched the remote, the footrest deployed and hit me square in the face. FML
Today, I took a well-aimed TV remote to the testicles. My wife’s pregnancy cravings are really bad and I forgot to restock the cupboard with apricot jam and packets of sage and onion stuffing. FML
Today, my husband removed the TV from our bedroom to improve our sex life. Still no sex because he watches TV on his iPhone. FML
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Top comments
Renesaga 8
Get it on one condition: It's gotta be $19.95
TheComputerGuy96 16
Your tv doesn't even have a power button?????? Unplugging it might be dangerous, but a tv without a physical power button is weird. (And I have an LCD tv)
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Comments (169)
RedPillSucks 33
YDI cause you can't find anything else to do but watch TV (and be on FML, apparently) YLS cause you can't find anything else to do but watch TV. The good news is you now have an 8'' ********.
mak3_1t_ra1n 0
really, op, turn it off. u probably need physical activity. especially since u couldn't change the channel, your next option was the Internet. that's a little sedentary.
t123d 0
The other night, I fell asleep with my tv on. I was having some weird dreams about the pos-t-vac, then when I woke up the infomercial for it was on lolol
RedPillSucks 33
Did I miss why this was in the intimacy section?
OvenproofToast 0
What channels are you watching?
Igor_g5 0
So get off your lazy ass and find the remote. Ho far could it have gone. Most likely it's in the same room as the TV. If you can't find it go buy a universal remote.
chicknugget5 4
come on people don't be haters. I'm pretty sure your tv has buttons but you just don't see them. I actually have a tv like that and you can only see the buttons in a certain light. my mom brought it home and I was like wtf where are the buttons? and we didn't see them until the light hit it right. so I'm sure it has buttons just try to find them
texas_Colt 0
I don't know why everyone has to break down everyone else's fml. it was funny. laugh or leave. don't gotta be hater. little dicks wish you had the number don't you!? jealous of OP.
wetherguy 0
So you would rather watch infomercials for products that do not apply to you than getting off your ass and actually doing something?
Not_Ever_Telling 3
Here's a grand idea: Why don't you turn off the TV or go buy a universal remote?