Today, I logged onto my computer to access a video from my porn stash. However, the folder was empty except for my favourite file. Thinking that a virus deleted everything, I was thankful my favourite file remained. When I opened it, I saw a video of my parents telling me not to masturbate. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was watching porn and found my mom on a webcam. When I told her that I saw her, she just took away my computer and told me to get off porn. FML
Today, my hard drive on my computer crashed with all of my files on it. I took it to my Dad, who is a computer analyst, to see if he could recover anything. The only thing that he could salvage was my illustrious collection of porn. FML
Today, my coworker returned the camera I lent her. After plugging the camera into my PC, I saw a file was still on it. Wanting to make sure I didn't delete something important, I opened it. To my horror, it was a video of my coworker pleasuring herself. She's old enough to be my mother. FML
Today, I found some porn videos in my parents room. I put them in and began to toss off, but as the camera moved up I realized it was my mom and my step-dad. FML
Today, I downloaded porn and saved it on my desktop. After watching it, I couldn't delete it, and now it is stuck on the desktop. It is a shared computer. FML
Today, I started watching porn in my room with the volume muted. A minute later, my dad knocked on the door, so I closed everything and called him in. He just said, "Son, you disgust me." and walked out. Now I'm too paranoid to use my own computer. FML
Today, my mother came into my room and had a thirty minute long conversation with me. She kept looking very nervous and uncomfortable. Only after she left did I realize that a porn site was open on my computer screen. The entire time. FML
Today, I got home from working late and decided to write a cute email to my girlfriend since I haven't seen her in two weeks. I was about to finish it off when my door swung open, and in a panic, I opened another tab to hide my email. It was porn. FML
Today, I found my dad's porn stash on his laptop. I went through it for a laugh to see what kind of sick, twisted shit he's into. Mostly nude pictures of my mum, as it turns out. I can't wipe the afterimage from my mind. FML
Today, when I got home, I went into my room to find a Bratz doll and a Ken doll laying naked, on top of each other on my bed. Attached to them was a note that stated, "Please use your imagination and find other ways besides porn to get excited. The computer keeps getting viruses. Love, Mom." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
robvicious_fml 0
masturbation is normal and healthy, tell'em to shut the **** up!
dino_witha_cape 0
delete all of their un-important files on their computer leaving a video of you screaming "NO!"
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (215)
robvicious_fml 0
masturbation is normal and healthy, tell'em to shut the **** up!
killerviral 0
I know or every guy would have blue balls
billyhirvine09 0
did you slap your sausage to it
Youdumbidiot 0
Please tell me how ************ is normal. I would really like to know.
FreddyMustDie 0
Your parents have issues
Hi_Itz_Me 0
masturbating is not normal. it's a sin. it's sad, really, that I'm one of the few people in this forum probably that doesn't **********
Youdumbidiot 0
I agree with you all the way. I have never masturbated before either
gIsaac 0
"it's a sin" why would anyone with a brain consider ************ a sin - - . when a person jacks it, he or she is giving his or her self a good time and in no way hurts anyone else. the only people who think it's sinful are stupid people who walk into a church with a sponge instead of a brain, sucking in everything they hear without thinking about it, probably out of fear. furthermore, why would God give us a sexual libido and only want us to use it to make children? is it because he DOESN'T want us to enjoy our lives? it is absolutely ridiculous what some people think, and ************ is just a way of keeping our hormones at bay between instances of sex.
zanguard 0
they didn't delete ur **** they sent to their computers!
MrNewOrleans 0
lol 176 win
elisewilloughby 0
You tell 'em 176! :D
48Connor 10
Everyone who says masturbation is wrong is a christian. GOD DOESNT EXIST!
beastxmanx45123 0
176 win
zacharytk72 5
176 you're my hero.
Gondile 4
190, I'm a Christian. Fap fap fap!!!
ACTriple3 5
You go #176
Ckpa23 0
Ok, why didnt you just set the file to "hidden" most parents wouldn't know how to make it visible
Leadamp 7
(174) It isn't a sin to **********. If you are a religious person then you should know that it is only a sin if you lust while doing it.
oSwag 0
Yes it's dumb to say masturbation is sinful, but also, if you don't believe in God or a higher power, keep that to yourself, or share on a forum with people with similar views. Don't push that onto others. It's just as annoying as religious fanatics.
Victoire_W 0
OK HELP ME SOMEONE! How the bloody hell is masturbating a sin?!?!
Victoire_W 0
I think it's fine so you don't get an underage person preggo
themkane 0
You son of a b***!!
gumbo1 8
I agree with 205
raww77 12
liar
lolzorspoop 0
that is hilarious, u have funny parents, still that sux
ThisisLegit 0
Wtf!
thewhiteninja 0
owned....just simply owned
tehhotness 0
did you whack off to it?
RyGan 0
Yes . Because Incest is a WIN
emoflopkitteh 0
Well obviously.
dino_witha_cape 0
delete all of their un-important files on their computer leaving a video of you screaming "NO!"
zanguard 0
win^
SaintJared 0
I'd have jerked off to it. There's nothing sexier than watching your parents talk about masturbating.
UrLifeDoesntSuck 0
Passwords and encryption, son. Maybe next time you'll know better. YDI for letting your parents be able to delete the files in the first place.
The_Cait 0
HAHAHAHahahahaha #5, that was hilarious.
UnCensoredBitch 0
HAHAHA! Busted!
Kassad_fml 0
Why the hell do your parents bother at all what you have on your computer. masturbation is healthy and they should not destroy what life is meant for :P :P