Today, I learned to never blast classic rock with your convertible's top down while passing an SUV full of gangbanger wanna-bes. That is, of course, unless you want your immaculate, newly detailed leather seats to be decorated with pretty brown and white milkshake stains. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I made fun of a girl singing passionately along to a song on her radio while in traffic next to me. She decided that her chocolate milkshake would make a good addition to my brand new seat covers. FML
Today, I gave my new boss a ride, since his car died. I probably should have checked the music before I started the car; I'm not sure hearing "Grandpa pissed his pants again…" as the opener to a song made a good impression on him. FML
Today, I was stoked to show my new car to my friends that I pulled into the parking lot a bit too fast, attempting to look cool. I accidentally hit the curb and ended up scratching the entire front bumper on a trash can that I didn't see. Now I have a busted up bumper, and my friends will probably never let me forget it. FML
Today, I purchased a new car. On the drive home, gusts of wind blew up debris and pebbles and caused little chips in the paint and small chips on the windshield. FML
Today, I was in my car and stopped at a red light. A homeless woman then started to throw rocks at my car for no apparent reason. I drive a convertible. FML
Today, I got caught singing '80s hair metal love ballads to myself in the car by the object of my affection. FML
Today, I learned that if you're going to light a bottle rocket and throw it out the window of a car, you should roll the window down before you light the bottle rocket. FML
Today, while I was reluctantly driving to work on a Sunday, some guy in a shiny Audi threw a plastic root beer bottle full of urine at my old Toyota. He didn’t even bother to put on the cap on, like a gentleman would. FML
Today, I drove my two kids to their friends' houses. In my convertible, looking what I though was my best, I slowed down outside a bar with cute 20 year old girls in front. My daughter noticed the speed reduction and said, "Keep driving dad, you're fat and mom left you for a reason." FML
Today, I was hanging in the street with the boys, listening to some jams on my car's new speaker system. Some asshole from the apartments above me threw a bag of trash at my car. Direct hit. FML
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Top comments
Aelaena 6
Wow assholes. I hate people like that, I hope you got a license yet that probably wouldn't do much.
zmiddz 0
Gangbangers drink milkshakes?
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Comments (243)
monkey9224 0
the lesson is never blast country rock unless your in Tennessee but that really does suck
delfino1604 24
the fml says classic rock.. not country.
Virtuoso 0
I'm assuming 'gangbangers' means something else in america...
fyourlife88 0
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Yes.
atomick 0
If other people wanted to listen to the same shitty music you are, they'd be sitting in your car.
guinness_fml 0
#21, it said "classic," not "country." Huge difference there. Maybe in the future don't blast your music so loud as to be obnoxious, but I still definitely hope you got their license plate number down. Make them pay for it
freddofrog 0
# 22 - Haha I had the same thought! = I'm hoping it does or else this FML is way more awkward than most people imagined xD
poobear 0
you deserve it for blasting your music
redSquirrel 0
Oh, I would have been enraged!
extremekiwi 0
Hey now, brown cow. Let's not get too carried away. We might hurt someones feelings.
xerao 0
All of you saying YDI, come on. Yes, someone blasting their music can be unintentionally a tad obnoxious, but damaging their car because of it? Let's talk punishment fitting the crime here.
ohdamn_fml 2
#2: Why should you have to deal with consequences for blasting music...?
Swan_fml 0
You shouldn't be blasting anything. But I understand why you would. Cool car - nice music - you were feeling good and someone brought you down. I hate gang banger wannabes! I hate gang bangers! Luckily it is leather and easy to clean. Cloth seats wouldn't have ever gotten all clean.