Today, I learned that everyone at college was calling me "Parallel Lines" because I've got an unibrow and an apparent hairiness over my mouth. By the way, I'm a girl. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was hanging out with my two friends. My hair was hanging over my upper lip, making it look like I had a big mustache. "Hey, look guys!" I said. "I have a mustache!" "I know," they both said without looking. I'm a girl. FML
Today, after cutting my hair and shaving, I had girls hitting on me for the first time ever! Too bad they thought I was a butch lesbian, not a man. FML
Today, I found out that my entire school differentiates me from another girl in my grade with the same name by saying, "No, she's the lesbian one." I'm straight. FML
Today, I was talking to a friend and bemoaning the fact that my new coworkers keep mixing up my gender. She looked at me critically and said, "Yeah, until you can grow a decent beard, people are going to keep thinking you're an intern or a butch lesbian." FML
Today, I found out that my classmates affectionately refer to me as "the kid whose eyes are really far apart." FML
Today, I was giving a talk in class, when halfway through someone pointed out that my pubes were sticking out my trousers. FML
Today, after growing my hair out for over a year and constantly being told that it makes me look like a girl, I finally cut it. The first thing my friends said when they saw me was that I now look like a "lesbian." FML
Today, I found out that since there are 3 people with the same name as me at work, I'm known as "the ugly one". FML
Today, one of my dad's work friends came over. As he was leaving, he complimented my dad on having three "strapping young boys." I informed him that I'm a girl, and I have a hormone imbalance that causes me to have a lot of hair and a deep voice. I guess my dress didn't give him a clue. FML
Today, I had to come to terms with having more facial hair than my boyfriend, despite being female since birth. FML
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Top comments
cabbitt 0
Don't whine about it. Fix it.
rpvia 0
your name must be helga
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Comments (135)
kyleryan 0
At least its a fairly educational name.......
MiSSxxuNDeRSTooD 4
YDI. I started waxing my brows when I was 12.
fylorydi1994 0
I started waxing my upper lip when I was 11 and got my eyebrows done when I was 10 lmao I don't think you're ten or eleven or twelve OP. So just remove your hair and get on with your life, even though that's a pretty catchy name and it'll stick for a while,even if you do eventually remove your hair. So if your worried about that part, and what people think, then you're pretty much screwed! So,uh, good luck!
Clumsyblonde22 12
Wax that shit now! It's called general up keep. No one wants to kiss a squirrel.
FarSide 23
You don't know where or how we get little squirrels, do you?
HentaiBunny 4
LOL that sucks!! But ydi for letting it get out of control.
TheNewGuy03 29
so unsexy. anyway, unless you particularly enjoy being demeaned and ignored by the male species, you'll do what the others before me have already stated. i wonder, what else don't you shave? then again, i'd rather not wonder... you cavewoman! :D |the kid|
justbemellow 0
best picture.
capricaz 0
um, pluck/wax? It requires $2 tweezers or $30 trip to a salon. It's not plastic surgery. Fix it if you don't like it.
GimmeSunglasses 0
And apparently you don't know how to write proper English. The rule of having "an" not "a" before a word starting with a vowel doesn't apply to unibrow because it doesn't flow together. Go learn how to write properly, Parallel Lines.
rockyraccoon28 8
yeah, I was definitely going to say that. I had to read this post twice, the first time I got distracted on the "an unibrow" bit.
FarSide 23
You're giving a grammar lesson and the best you can do to explain the issue is "it doesn't flow together"? Obviously you slept (or slept your way) through English.
TheNewGuy03 29
haha, i read it too fast to notice. the same rule works to the converse with the word "hour" -- despite the presence of a consonant, you would use the indefinite article "an" due to its pronunciation. the hard and fast rule is that if there is a vowel *sound* at the beginning of the word, "a" is used; in any other case, "an" is used. this includes the "y" sound, which is treated like that of a consonant. |the kid|
TheNewGuy03 29
my apologies -- switch "a" and "an" in the second sentence! whoops! |the kid|
lol32360 0
:( i have hairy arms and im a girl too
elmorous 0
Esthetics! Google it!
lalala2589 0
Put rogane on your nose and people will call you perpendicular lines. At least it gets rid of parallel?