Today, I learned that a spontaneous romantic gesture of arriving home early with flowers and wine is not welcome when your wife is busy having sex with your brother. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I learned that a spontaneous romantic gesture of arriving home early with flowers and wine is not welcome when your wife is busy having sex with your brother. FML
Today, I rushed home because my wife called to let me know she was feeling horny for the first time after getting over a bad flu. I walked in the door and surprise surprise, her sister had called round, wanting sympathy after her latest fuckbuddy dumped her. Romantic mood ruined. FML
Today, I went home early from a business trip to find my house covered with rose petals. Thinking it was a romantic notion from my boyfriend, I went up to the bedroom. I opened the door to find him lying there, getting it on with my sister. FML
Today, I realized our life has been lacking in romance lately, so I got a card, a bunch of flowers, and made reservations at a lovely restaurant for a nice evening. When I got home and gave my wife the flowers, all she did was sigh and ask what I "fucked up this time." She also refused to go to dinner. FML
Today, I sent the kids to my parents' house, tidied the house, and made reservations for a fancy restaurant, hoping to surprise my wife. When she got home and I handed her flowers, she sighed and said, "Can you stop with the stupid romance shit? It's embarrassing. We're six years married, not two moonstruck kids." FML
Today, I caught my wife trying to give herself oral sex. It was sexy and also kinda funny, so I offered to do it to her properly. She got explosively mad for some reason and actually threw me out. I’m writing this from my brother's spare room, wondering where I went wrong. FML
Today, my wife told me she had a surprise for me when I came home. Surprise to me means sex, not a new puppy. FML
Today, on a whim, I bought my wife some flowers on my way home. She put them in a vase then asked me what stupid thing I did that I’m pre-apologising for. She refuses to believe I bought her flowers for any other reason. Man, I must be a really shitty husband. FML
Today, I got flowers at work. I was excited, until I saw they were from a friend saying, "Sorry for sleeping with your boyfriend!" FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to visit me and my brother at our apartment. I left for just five minutes to fix us lunch. When I got back, she was making out with my brother. FML
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Top comments
Nykaen 0
Dude... Leave her, she is worthless. And disown your brother... No man should ever do that to family.
crazyval619 6
Dude that sucks.
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Comments (176)
beeship321 5
I know brothers share a lot but this is going too far
shillaw 0
If I'm you, I'll never talk to your own brother lol and yeah, just leave her!!!!!
Egghaus 0
Beat the shit out of her, leave her and never talk to your brother again. FYL seriously.
AXavierB 1
Damn. It's bad enough to have your spouse cheat on you, but with your own flesh and blood? What kind of guy would do that to his own brother? It may sound immature, but in my opinion it would be excellent revenge to sleep with HIS wife if he has one.
marcelomelo 0
really sux
Rodila 0
Personally, I would see it as a free ticket out. Both of them are screwed. You are free to start over. Best that you found out now, rather than later. Just don't let the next one meet your brother.
diemileyjk 0
choke a bitch
sania27 0
omgg, that just sucks, i feel so sorry for you!
Tupperware_fml 0
you should have known that from the begining. did you at least knock? or let them finish?
Stragler 0
Sorry for ur luck dude. And don't dump her. Try to talk it out, mate. Far too many couples run straight down the divorce road. Is that what you want? I hope not...