Today, I joined a new choir. My director asked me if my best friend was actually my girlfriend. Taken aback, I said no, I was not a lesbian. He then asked me to clarify my gender. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML
Today, I told my best friend she looked great in the dress she was wearing. My boyfriend overheard and is now convinced I'm a lesbian. FML
Today, I finally got the courage to ask my best friend to go on a date with me. She assumed I meant a double date and squealed, "Who's the lucky guy?!" She thought I was her gay best friend for the past year. FML
Today, I sang at a retirement home with my school choir. Afterwards, we went to speak to the old people, just to get to know them a little. The first woman I shook hands with asked, "Are you a boy or a girl?" FML
Today, my best friend confessed to me that she's a lesbian. She quickly added, "Oh, don't worry, I don't like you. You're not attractive." FML
Today, I asked a girl out. She replied, "Sorry, I'm suddenly a lesbian." FML
Today, I steeled my nerve, gritted my teeth, pulled my finger out, and asked our new coworker on a date. He looked at me weird, then said those four words, “But I’m not gay.” Five weeks we’ve worked together and all that time he thought I was a man. I’m a woman, born a woman, with a vagina. FML
Today, I came out as a lesbian to my friends. They were supportive, save for my one friend, who accused me of copying her by also being a lesbian. FML
Today, I went on the best date I've been on in years. Later on, over drinks we get talking and I explain how I came out to my friends and family. When I ask him how he came out, he replies that he isn't gay, and oh, did I think this was a date? FML
Today, I found out that my friends were convinced that I was gay. I have known most of them for 3 plus years, they all thought my girlfriend was a special shopping partner. I found this out while announcing my engagement. FML
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Top comments
boundbytheanimus 9
It's weird that upon first meeting you he'd inquire about your relationship with your friend anyway.
chickenflem 8
Taken aback you should have asked him when last he got his eyes checked out ;)
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Comments (218)
brandonc 3
really? and I'm sure your name wasn't good enough to confirm that gender question before he asked it.
terrask 11
Cant be mad at the man, he was completely honest and foward with the issue at hand. Sucks to be you though...
Calyx_fml 22
To which you should have told him that you are a hermaphrodite, just to blow his mind.
hateevryone 15
you must be a tomboy? but that still wouldn't explain his rudeness.
cookeemonster 7
Should've gone to specsavers
MissMae93 23
I hate how poorly written this FML is. My brain couldn't comprehend until about the third try. Please learn how to use a comma and brackets for next time. Thanks.
cookeemonster 7
It's written fine and it's easily understandable. You just didn't get it.
MissMae93 23
ACTUALLY, the FML has been edited since I first viewed it.
Shrike 24
Looks the same as when I read it earlier. Love how she makes excuses when people call her on being stupid. xP
MissMae93 23
"The director asked if my best friend who I walked in with was my girlfriend" is what it read previously, so I beg to differ.
Shrike 24
I love how she backtracks when some one points out how illiterate she is. xP
bizarre_ftw 22
I think "lesbian" clearers everything up, there's no real variation in the genders there, your teacher is either a simple dick or a plain moron
boredfishing 0
Quit dressing like a scrub and take a shower once in awhile.
PawnShopPenguin 4
158, look who's talking...
desireev 18
Ok.. Listen, kid! You may think you're cool dropping insults like that and saying extremely rude things, but you're not! Don't come in here and start being a total jackass! Grow up!
MissMae93 23
I don't expect you to be mature or anything considering you're 14, but honestly shut up. Didn't your mother ever teach you if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all?
RyanPTheNinja 2
200 and 201 b hatin on u