Today, I joined a new choir. My director asked me if my best friend was actually my girlfriend. Taken aback, I said no, I was not a lesbian. He then asked me to clarify my gender. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML
Today, I told my best friend she looked great in the dress she was wearing. My boyfriend overheard and is now convinced I'm a lesbian. FML
Friendzone 2.0
Today, I finally got the courage to ask my best friend to go on a date with me. She assumed I meant a double date and squealed, "Who's the lucky guy?!" She thought I was her gay best friend for the past year. FML
Passing
Today, I sang at a retirement home with my school choir. Afterwards, we went to speak to the old people, just to get to know them a little. The first woman I shook hands with asked, "Are you a boy or a girl?" FML
Today, my best friend confessed to me that she's a lesbian. She quickly added, "Oh, don't worry, I don't like you. You're not attractive." FML
Today, I asked a girl out. She replied, "Sorry, I'm suddenly a lesbian." FML
Confused
Today, I steeled my nerve, gritted my teeth, pulled my finger out, and asked our new coworker on a date. He looked at me weird, then said those four words, “But I’m not gay.” Five weeks we’ve worked together and all that time he thought I was a man. I’m a woman, born a woman, with a vagina. FML
Identity politics
Today, I came out as a lesbian to my friends. They were supportive, save for my one friend, who accused me of copying her by also being a lesbian. FML
Today, I went on the best date I've been on in years. Later on, over drinks we get talking and I explain how I came out to my friends and family. When I ask him how he came out, he replies that he isn't gay, and oh, did I think this was a date? FML
Today, I found out that my friends were convinced that I was gay. I have known most of them for 3 plus years, they all thought my girlfriend was a special shopping partner. I found this out while announcing my engagement. FML
Top comments
boundbytheanimus 9
It's weird that upon first meeting you he'd inquire about your relationship with your friend anyway.
chickenflem 8
Taken aback you should have asked him when last he got his eyes checked out ;)
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Comments (218)
JMichael 26
Was his name Doc Shuman by chance?
flashback.miss 28
pfft laugh it off and move on op dont let it hinder your choir enjoyment
boundbytheanimus 9
I was expecting a reply made entirely of lyrics and I'm very disappointed.
ciscmowe 5
At least he didn't ask you to clarify what type of species you were.
hilary56 0
1st, if she was your girlfriend, it's none of your choir directors business & 2nd, he should know your gender already!! If he is the director he's like he teacher and should already have that shit on file! & 3rd, that just sucks! Fyl
fuzz97 23
If OP is joining a choir, perhaps he is a castrati?
1crabbygirl 10
Only a guy can be a castrato. If there were 2, they'd be castrati.
fourthfloor 3
That's strange, if you joined the choir, he must have checked your voice range. I doub he put you with the tenors, or did he?
Sabrewulf 8
Damn...that really sucks OP.
lpncubby 1
Sounds fishy...
AgaveLoco 5
Is the director blind?
MIDMichele 5
Damn. That's terrible.