anonamous
United States
Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Fresno, United States
Today, I was playing with my dog, when she started sniffing my face. Jokingly, I got up and started to sniff her face back and asked "Yeah, how do you like that?" She replied by biting into my face. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff
Tucson, United States
Doggy dog world
Today, I was playing tug of war with my dog. She let go and I ended up punching myself in the mouth. My lip is still swollen. FML
phillyfan4life
United States
Today, I saw my dog sleeping, so I laid next to her and put her arm around my neck to be cute. Only for her to wake up and bite my nose. FML
smellsofeggs
United Kingdom
Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the point that our dog likes me better than him. To this, my dog jumped onto the sofa, turned to me and vomited on my face. FML
Addicted2FML303
United States
Today, I was on the couch, about to make out with the guy I've been dating. As soon as our lips touched, my overprotective dog ran up and bit him. He bled. FML
fmlman
Rawlins, United States
Today, while walking my dog at the park, I spotted my crush and said "Hi!" By not paying attention where I was going, I tripped and fell down. My dog started humping me. FML
Anonymous
Bedford, United States
Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML
RomanceFail
Crestwood, United States
Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML
thedogkisser
United States
Today, when petting my friend's dog, I acted like I was going to make out with him. While I wasn't looking the dog stuck his entire tongue in my mouth. FML
Foreigner Fail
Jackson Galaxy moment
Today, I meowed at my cat and he got really close to me. I then meowed again and he punched me in the face. Them's fightin' words, it seems. FML
Top comments
i_wuz_nver_here 31
Tough love bitch!
mpj13 8
She loves you!
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Comments (107)
doglover100 29
You have to be careful about kissing dogs on the face. You are invading their personal space.
krompf 3
Solution: tell it you're going to go for a ride. It will eagerly jump into your car, making it even easier to drive it out to the middle of nowhere, chuck it out the window, and drive away fast
Jeffrey Laymon 6
Cesar Milan *heavy breathing*
TheSacredRatty 18
Idiot! Hugs and kisses stress the dog out and are threatening to them.
jobekka 20
i hugged and kissed my dog when I was 5, where i ended up forcing her head way back. my dog didn't maul me for it, but my mom did. they're still animals at the end of the day, and animals react like animals if you force them far enough.