Today, I hooked up with a girl from the bar. We went back to my place and started making out, I took off her shirt and bra and started kissing her breasts. I felt her chest hair tickle my tongue. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I met a girl at a bar, we had a few drinks and really hit it off. We headed back to my place to get a little action. As she was riding me, she got rougher and rougher until she reached down and yanked a patch of hair right out of my beard. I yelped in pain and didn’t even finish. FML
Today, after months of Tinder-ing, first dates and being rejected, I finally was able to hook up with a girl. We met, we kissed, we danced and I took her back to my place. She then promptly tried to make out with my roommate. FML
Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML
Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was. Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub. I somehow managed to unhook her bra. FML
Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to my house. Hoping to get a little action, I started to make out with her. Unfortunately I was wearing basketball shorts so when I got an erection, all she did was bat it back forth like a cat toy. FML
Today, I was at a bar talking to a very attractive young woman. I began to see that she wanted me as she pulled closer and closer. Eventually she pulled me in and licked my ear lobe sensually. She then said, "I wanna break your collar bone" in a seductive tone. FML
Today, I was going to hook up with a new girl. She told me not to shower or wear deodorant when I came over, which I thought was a little odd but went along with. As we were getting warmed up, she started licking my sweaty armpit and moaning loudly. This is probably too weird to tolerate. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML
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Top comments
kellster 2
Either she was a tranny, or you're really exaggerating. You do know that people have body hair, right? As in, the tiny, fuzzy kind? You'd probably better get over that pretty soon or you'll never have sex again.
icanhazlizard 0
I agree with 3 and 6. Hair is a natural part of being human. The girls are already expected to shave way more of their bodies than men have to be socially acceptable. I'm sick of hearing about how the hair on girls is disgusting. We shouldn't be rejected or made to go through ridiculously elaborate and time-consuming grooming routines because of it. It's *natural*. Get the **** over it.
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Comments (325)
Nomad609 0
to those who say its normal to have hair on the chest for the girls, yes you're right but I believe the OP would be able to distinguish whether its a guys chest hair or not.
Jefe_fml 0
HAWT
elen25 0
Oh please, grow the **** up. How old are you? Sounds like this was your first time with a girl to notice any of this. Girls have peach fuzz (lanugo hair)all over their body, it's up to them if they want to remove the hair for esthetic reasons. I also highly doubt it that the hair was long and prickly (terminal hair) in that area anyhow...cause that is rare.
kwbuzz23wk 0
12 wins. 10 is partially correct but sounds cranky in her complaints.
krisFrAnHeehar 0
I completely agree with #10. Why should we have to shave there if no one really sees it but your bf (unless your a ***** and flash people everyday). If a woman chooses to shave or wax ect. thats HER choice NOT your. Guys don't apologize for having TOO much hair or a tiny penis because you cant help it, so why should we be expected to apologize for peach fuzz that we cant help. And #66 is right, it's peach fuzz. Peach fuzz is EVERYWHERE but the insides of your fingers and toes so GET.THE.****.OVER.IT.
dancing_bear 0
#10 ftw. Grow the **** up, OP. Unless she has a hormone disorder or something (in which case the poor woman probably has enough to deal with without an immature prick like you trying to make her a laughing stock on the internet), I highly doubt the hair on her chest was even long enough to notice. It was just peach fuzz. So you felt it on your tongue. Um... people, male and female, have body hair all over their bodies. So yes, if you kiss them, you might feel it. If you can't deal with that, you shouldn't be having physical relationships because there's no way round it. But you probably shouldn't be having any sort of relationship anyway because you apparently have the mental age of a twelve year old.
lulzy 0
i agree with 10, girls have body hair too so get the **** over it.
Rellikiox 0
Today, I hooked up with a guy from the bar. We went to his place and started making out, He took off my shirt and bra and started kissing my breasts. Suddenly, He freaked out and ran to his computer to post in FML that I have hair in my chest. FHL Also, do you have hair? Because maybe that's gross to her...
pinkXrainbow 0
thank you! what a prick.
cough 0
lol at all the people getting sensitive about women's body hair and how society makes women shave too much what is it about this site's comments section that brings out the biggest whiners of all time?
warmvanillasugar 0
On 1st street in Santa Ana after all the local bars close all they guys that didn't hook up, go to the parking lot of the FOOD FOR LESS and pay for the "girl" of their choice, yeah at 3 am these guys are so tanked they aren't even choosing the transvestites without the leg hair. This is good one, it was the alcohol, yeah I didn't know. Stay sober or come out the closet, better yet come out for some hysterical laughs in the parking lot.