Today, I helped my grandparents carry luggage to their hotel room, where they're staying the night tonight after my wedding reception. Their room is 203. Mine is 201. Their room shares a wall with my honeymoon suite. My grandparents are going to hear me consummate my marriage. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They checked to see if I was asleep, so I pretended to be to avoid getting scolded for staying up. Turns out they were checking so that they could make love. I witnessed two 70-year-olds have sex in the bed next to me for 20 minutes. FML
Today, while on vacation, I realized my parents and grandparents had been running off and doing quite a few errands lately. After doing some sleuthing, I discovered they were taking turns having blood-curdling sex in our other hotel room down the hall. FML
Today, my in-laws moved in. FML
Today, my fiancée decided to go on a "vacation." Our wedding is tomorrow. FML
Today, as my husband and I were leaving our wedding reception, my mother-in-law hugged me and whispered in my ear, "You're gonna do great tonight!" FML
Today, I walked into my hotel room, took off my coat and started unpacking. Ten minutes later, an older couple walked in, holding luggage. I'd gone into THEIR room. The receptionist gave me the wrong fob. They were surprisingly calm, but I had to explain why I’d already used one of their towels. FML
Today, after a very long day, I needed a hotel room but the only one available was a honeymoon suite. I was so tired, I just said yes. My wife just called demanding to know why I was charging a romantic room to our joint credit card, and if I’ve got a woman with me. I just want to go to sleep. FML
Today, my in-laws decided they were going to stay an extra week during our vacation to Dominican Republic next year. This would be fine, if we weren't travelling for our destination wedding, and the extra week wasn't our honeymoon. They are literally joining us on our honeymoon. FML
Today, I practiced my wedding vows in front of the mirror we have in the hallway. When I was done, I heard clapping from my living room. Turns out my fiancé’s parents had come over early for dinner and had heard everything. FML
Today, we got on the plane for our honeymoon and her parents were on the same damn plane, going to the same spa resort, in the room next door, and my wife has the nerve to tell me it was a coincidence. How we supposed to get our sexy freak on, sharing a bedroom wall with her repressed mother? FML
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Top comments
uberrcool 0
Wow, that must suck. Maybe you could ask them to move? In a polite way?
Bigblackbunny 2
Who says it has to be in the hotel room? Go somewhere else.
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Comments (117)
vampirate 0
meh, they won't give a ****.
guinevere 0
I'm sure you're grandparents know what happens. I don't see how this is an fml. Anyway, old people can't hear.
haxromana 2
I'm assuming that the wedding wasn't actually today and the OP just took some creative license to fit the "Today, (...). FML" format.
Billbo179 0
WTF are you doing online on your wedding day/night? Let your grandparents hear, its not like they dont expect it.
popemichael 9
That happened to me too except it was my parents. I feel your pain.
nikki1001 0
What a weird hotel to have the honeymoon suite attached to a regular room. How obnoxious for anyone, ever in that other room, not even just your grandparents.
Michre 0
Seriously, don't care about them - It's your special night, if they're good grandparents all they will do is laugh at how much you made her moan. It's a fun thing.
remy3x 0
LOL. You win.
aback 5
Let's hope they're deaf. And maybe you lovebirds can save the yodeling and Tarzan yells for later.
birds_fml 7
Old people can't hear good anyways, they probably won't hear a thing. They take their hearing aids out to sleep, and go to bed at like 7, so there's no way they'll hear it. FURTHERMORE, hotel walls are usually really well insulated, unless you're putting your family up at like Motel 8 or something.
Sappheyes 0
Sounds like a destination wedding, or perhaps you're just staying the night until you can travel in the morning refreshed. I certainly hope that you aren't spending your Honeymoon in the same city that you live in... *shudder* Just ask them to take their hearing aids out!
_insertnamehere_ 0
Watch, the grandparents are going to have loud, drunk, slutty wedding sex themselves! The bride and groom will be more horrified listening to them having old people sex than they ever would have been if the grandparents had accidently heard them. It is, after all, a special occassion...