Today, I helped my grandparents carry luggage to their hotel room, where they're staying the night tonight after my wedding reception. Their room is 203. Mine is 201. Their room shares a wall with my honeymoon suite. My grandparents are going to hear me consummate my marriage. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They checked to see if I was asleep, so I pretended to be to avoid getting scolded for staying up. Turns out they were checking so that they could make love. I witnessed two 70-year-olds have sex in the bed next to me for 20 minutes. FML
Today, while on vacation, I realized my parents and grandparents had been running off and doing quite a few errands lately. After doing some sleuthing, I discovered they were taking turns having blood-curdling sex in our other hotel room down the hall. FML
Today, my in-laws moved in. FML
Today, my fiancée decided to go on a "vacation." Our wedding is tomorrow. FML
Today, as my husband and I were leaving our wedding reception, my mother-in-law hugged me and whispered in my ear, "You're gonna do great tonight!" FML
Today, I walked into my hotel room, took off my coat and started unpacking. Ten minutes later, an older couple walked in, holding luggage. I'd gone into THEIR room. The receptionist gave me the wrong fob. They were surprisingly calm, but I had to explain why I’d already used one of their towels. FML
Today, after a very long day, I needed a hotel room but the only one available was a honeymoon suite. I was so tired, I just said yes. My wife just called demanding to know why I was charging a romantic room to our joint credit card, and if I’ve got a woman with me. I just want to go to sleep. FML
Today, my in-laws decided they were going to stay an extra week during our vacation to Dominican Republic next year. This would be fine, if we weren't travelling for our destination wedding, and the extra week wasn't our honeymoon. They are literally joining us on our honeymoon. FML
Today, I practiced my wedding vows in front of the mirror we have in the hallway. When I was done, I heard clapping from my living room. Turns out my fiancé’s parents had come over early for dinner and had heard everything. FML
Today, we got on the plane for our honeymoon and her parents were on the same damn plane, going to the same spa resort, in the room next door, and my wife has the nerve to tell me it was a coincidence. How we supposed to get our sexy freak on, sharing a bedroom wall with her repressed mother? FML
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Top comments
uberrcool 0
Wow, that must suck. Maybe you could ask them to move? In a polite way?
Bigblackbunny 2
Who says it has to be in the hotel room? Go somewhere else.
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Comments (117)
uberrcool 0
Wow, that must suck. Maybe you could ask them to move? In a polite way?
MARIOHGALACKSIE 0
I agree, I don't understand why either you or your grandparents can't move...?
onigiriqueen 0
I don't understand why the hell they got that room in the FIRST place! Honestly, you should REALLY learn how to think these things through!
FarSide 23
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
like you have not already consummated your marriage...
Manny_B92 0
22 I highly doubt this...
Vitamin_C 0
**** that, i demand sex on my wedding night, tired or not!
birds_fml 7
I didn't have sex my wedding night... we were too tired from the wedding and the concert we went to afterwards. You don't need to have sex on your wedding night... who waits till they're married anyways?
Lunie_fml 0
Not true. I had sex on MY wedding night. And the day had been most exhausting. It happened though. It was awesome.
macropixi 0
yeah that's what happened when we got married, so tired we just fell asleep. No newlywed sex.
spirited_away33 0
Some people wait until they're married. Don't be insensitive.
your_face 15
People with old-fashioned values wait until they're married. Virgin brides are not extinct.
Mr_Positive 3
#1 is right, and no #65 - the room beside them can be empty you know..I mean if the grandparents move to another room
DorkusD 0
You can't consummate the marriage until you're married, idiot. Anything before that is just plain ol' sex.
jet_fml 0
76: Well, gee, that's why he said AFTER his reception. ETA: I wish they would nest these comments lower than one level.
SnIpEr_fml 0
Sorry dude, but your the idiot this time. 76 wasn't replying to the OP, she was replying to 22. look closely before you comment
bored_now 0
just change your reservation... if the hotel has at least two floors i'm sure they have another room you can switch to.
Snowstar 0
97- *You're an idiot.
SomeBossOnHere 5
It's you're, as in "you're the idiot."
Fresh2death2021 0
i call second =)
seb12992 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
****, why the hell are your grandparents staying in the hotel you're going to be at? Tell those old ***** to go somewhere else.
ssflyer3m 0
sucks for you agree with 1
Bigblackbunny 2
Who says it has to be in the hotel room? Go somewhere else.
reaza13 0
You could move somewhere else. OR do it quietly, if possible :)
koji_fml 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
why should that be a bad thing?
spiffles 0
It's certainly not like they would be shocked that you should be having sex on your wedding night. Sorry to bring up the image, but they did it too--like 70 years ago....
nxkftw 0
Ugh, that's horrible. FYL. and just for those who don't know. Consummate - to complete (the union of a marriage) by the first marital sexual intercourse.
CherishFlowers 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Who asked? Do you just assume that everyone who reads this is stupid? Wow.
abcxyz123 0
CherishFlowers, stfu.
arienh4 0
English is not my native language and I wasn't that sure what it meant indeed. You really think everyone here has a native understanding of the language? Wow.
cpatrick820 3
Honey Moon Suite It should be expected
MizzHollywood 0
I don't think it's the honeymoon suite. I think that when the OP said that she meant the suite she was staying in after her wedding. But a honeymoon suite would NOT be connected to another room. Seriously doubt that. she said MY honeymoon suite. Maybe, it's just a thing to call where you are sleeping that night, honeymoon suite or not(in the hotel), a honeymoon suite. (i'm looking at #46) So yeah i don't think it's to be expected (no offence)
i_luv_puppies 1
On my honeymoon night the last thing on my mind would be respecting my neighors. I'm just sayin'....
Wittlestalker 0
Way to jump to conclusions! There were people who didn't understand what meant and she told them. Get over it. :/
i_luv_puppies 1
lots of people above you did dumbass!
SnIpEr_fml 0
Yeah dude, stufo and gtfo. Your opinions clearly aren't wanted
Already_Dead 15
Shut up #10. A lot of people did NOT know the word, and he/she was just trying to help. You don't have to be a bitch about it. Grow up, please.
TheMongoose333 0
Yo chill out #10. Have you read the commentson FML before? That questions probably going to come up a few more times, even with her defining it.
nice18 0
Yo wat dos consumate meen? I joke, I joke.
nick0011 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Yeah what in the hell does consumate mean are u going to eat her?? well maybe eat her out but lmao jk i know what it means. I bet the grandparents did this on purpose =P