Today, I heard from multiple people that my girlfriend called me a dumbass because I apparently sent her "Good Morning" twice. We aren't even three full days into the relationship. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Forwarded
Today, my boyfriend emailed me this morning to let me know that he had forwarded the joke that I had sent to him to all of his workmates and friends. He was quickly given the heads-up by one of his friends that all of our intimate emails from the day were also included. I'm dating a dumbass. FML
Overbearing girlfriend
Today, I woke up, thinking it was going to be a good day. However, when I looked at my phone, I saw that my girlfriend had sent me an obscene number of angry messages, which are still coming in, because I forgot to say goodnight to her last night. FML
Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML
Today, I sent my girlfriend a text this morning saying I love you. I rarely do this and instead of receiving the same message back, I got a message from my girlfriend accusing me of meaning to send it to someone else and dumped me. FML
Today, I sent my girlfriend a long-overdue message telling her I feel like she doesn't really care about me any more, that it seems like she only ever calls me when she needs money, and that I'm even starting to suspect she may be cheating on me. 14 hours later, she replied: "TL;DR". FML
Carrier pigeon
Today, I sent my girlfriend a nice "Good morning" text after I woke up. Then I found a paper note stuck to my bedroom door, in which she broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she didn't know we were actually dating. FML
Today, I found out that my contact name in my girlfriend's phone is "Dipshit McFucktard". FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she loved me for the first time. Unfortunately, it was her way of saying that she didn't want to lose me after cheating on me yesterday. FML
Today, my girlfriend berated me for my "lack of communication skills", all while deeply engrossed with something on her phone. FML
Top comments
MrLonelyHertz 23
Well, either she's playing around and doesn't mean it, or you've got yourself a problem there, Houston!
OysterPearls 33
And later on, (assuming you stay with her), she'll be whining about how you don't send her good morning texts like the "goals" couples on those ideal relationship Twitter pages.
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Comments (37)
1234as 5
why is she talking smack about you behind your back? over a double txt? you dont call your significant other a dumbass (even IF she was joking). Honestly, show some self respect, bid farewell to this girl and move on to a better (and nicer) partner. Best of luck OP
DollyStardust 5
Really? My other half & I constantly insult each other, haha. All depends on the tone.
andrmac 25
Well can't he just be her dumbass?
CrazyMommy6509 11
My fiancé and I insult each other daily for the last 7 1/2 years. He's my dumb ass and I'm his pain in the ass
SmittyJA24 26
Is it actually a "3-day relationship", or did you **** her 3 days ago? Either way, stifle the pleasantries & let her know you want to take her out again this weekend.
sw2f2fchik612 12
What...
Talis99 26
Why do people call someone a girlfriend/boyfriend when you haven't even been together even a freaking week?
soullyfe 33
We really don't know how long they've been interested in one another or gone on dates before they decided to make it official.
InfiniteSunshine 32
Why does it matter? If you discuss it and make a commitment, then you're official. Why shouldn't you call each other boyfriend and girlfriend at that point? My boyfriend and I met online, didn't know each other before, and made it official in less than a week. We had a lot in common and it just felt right. We did this because we only wanted to be dating each other, and even though it was early, we wanted to be each other's partner, not just some person we were seeing.
xx000o 27
How do you know if he didn't call you his online dumbass before the two of you connected?
artistswife 19
Calling someone "dumbass" is not a nice thing to do. Calling someone "girlfriend" after 3 days is not right either. She might not be thinking you are her boyfriend therefore her unkind words…
ShleeG 23
Maybe they made it official 3 days ago but have been dating for months
delichick 27
I completely agree #20
LAURA_EL_JUICE 6
How old is she? Forget her this is the first red light sign. She needs to respect you and have your back instead of gossiping.
delichick 27
She.doesnt sound old enough to be your 'girlfriend' if she calling you names behind your back. Unless you think both of you are exclusive and she doesnt.
alaina1104 11
Dump. Her.
tjpr314 8
Dump her now and save yourself from any future unnecessary headaches because you made a mistake like human beings do and because she is a crazy insensitive bitch. Ugh some people are so petty and deserve to be alone.
gsouther 11
Red flag #1
FailStaff 15
As a master of sarcasm, maybe it was a playful joke?