Today, I heard from multiple people that my girlfriend called me a dumbass because I apparently sent her "Good Morning" twice. We aren't even three full days into the relationship. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend emailed me this morning to let me know that he had forwarded the joke that I had sent to him to all of his workmates and friends. He was quickly given the heads-up by one of his friends that all of our intimate emails from the day were also included. I'm dating a dumbass. FML
Today, I woke up, thinking it was going to be a good day. However, when I looked at my phone, I saw that my girlfriend had sent me an obscene number of angry messages, which are still coming in, because I forgot to say goodnight to her last night. FML
Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML
Today, I sent my girlfriend a text this morning saying I love you. I rarely do this and instead of receiving the same message back, I got a message from my girlfriend accusing me of meaning to send it to someone else and dumped me. FML
Today, I sent my girlfriend a long-overdue message telling her I feel like she doesn't really care about me any more, that it seems like she only ever calls me when she needs money, and that I'm even starting to suspect she may be cheating on me. 14 hours later, she replied: "TL;DR". FML
Today, I sent my girlfriend a nice "Good morning" text after I woke up. Then I found a paper note stuck to my bedroom door, in which she broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she didn't know we were actually dating. FML
Today, I found out that my contact name in my girlfriend's phone is "Dipshit McFucktard". FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she loved me for the first time. Unfortunately, it was her way of saying that she didn't want to lose me after cheating on me yesterday. FML
Today, my girlfriend berated me for my "lack of communication skills", all while deeply engrossed with something on her phone. FML
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Top comments
MrLonelyHertz 23
Well, either she's playing around and doesn't mean it, or you've got yourself a problem there, Houston!
OysterPearls 33
And later on, (assuming you stay with her), she'll be whining about how you don't send her good morning texts like the "goals" couples on those ideal relationship Twitter pages.
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Comments (37)
MrLonelyHertz 23
Well, either she's playing around and doesn't mean it, or you've got yourself a problem there, Houston!
142asdfqq 14
I can't help but think this would be funnier if he was from Texas and not Colorado
crudeandrudeguy 29
How much love and admiration do you expect her to have for you after three days?
MDoremis 38
More than that. You should still be in the honeymoon "You're perfect"/"No, you're perfect" stage at three days.
Lalala579121 28
I'm sure OP and his girlfriend have known each other for longer than three days.
nykkilynn16 7
Eh, they might be 15 year olds, expecting love to just happen and happen immediately.
carmbees 12
I dunno, I met my boyfriend and we started dating three days later, so you never know
OysterPearls 33
And later on, (assuming you stay with her), she'll be whining about how you don't send her good morning texts like the "goals" couples on those ideal relationship Twitter pages.
drayloon 50
Is this a hint....lol
dohdohdoh 13
Dump and run. If she can't overlook minor hiccups forget having a lasting relationship. Unless she's a really hot nymphomaniac.
mfmylifesrsly 30
I liked this comment before reading the last sentence. Regrets.
Talis99 26
It's okay, I down voted for us both.
lovebooks07 15
She should be greatful, because you wished her an extra good morning
Forrice 12
RUN while you still can
Lalala579121 28
Well why did you? Well why did you?
Catdragon 40
Better 3 days than 3 years
DelugeandDrought 7
In my experience, when someone is dim witted enough to believe you purposely sent something like that twice and go bitch about it, they end up being very irritating. I hope she isn't actually going to be this particular about everything in the relationship.
SteveDudleyUK 10
If you have not already dumped her then she is right, you are a dumbass.