Today, I have three cracked ribs. I have also, for the first time in my life, developed a case of the hiccups that simply will NOT go away. It's been hours. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I cracked a rib coughing. FML
Today, I tripped and fell, damaging my sternum and making it incredibly painful to breathe in or out too much. About ten minutes later, I got the hiccups. FML
Today, I coughed so hard that I fractured two ribs. FML
Today, as always, I get the hiccups ten times a day, sometimes more. They are very painful, and the only thing that makes them go away is water. The doctors have found no apparent cause. I hate my body. FML
Today, after battling for hours to get just a little sleep before my early morning work shift, I finally began drifting off. Then I got the worst attack of hiccups in my life. FML
Today, I fractured two ribs from coughing. My doctor told me to stop coughing, or I would fracture them more. I have bronchitis. FML
Today, I coughed so hard that I tore an intercostal muscle in my ribs. Now I can't cover my cough, as I have to cross my arms against my ribcage to stop the pain. FML, FML, F Me All Day Long (sung to the tune of Jingle Bells). FML
Today, I had the pleasure of finding out how it feels to poop with 3 broken ribs. FML
Today, after finally breaking my addiction to sleeping pills, right as I was drifting off to sleep at my first decent drug-free time in over 4 years... I got the hiccups. FML
Today, I've had a cold for over a week, and I've been coughing so hard, I bruised my ribs. I'm also 8 months pregnant. Guess where my son likes to kick me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
anon80214 15
Have someone show you the medical bills, that should scare you.
ManInTheMachine 20
Stand on your head. Jump up and down. Burp. Drink Ginger Ale. Hold your breath. Get scared. Drink water. Juggle. Yell. Breathe through your mouth. ...and by the time you've read through all of these stupid, inane remedies, you would've forgotten to hiccup. You're welcome.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (124)
perdix 31
I'd say something funny here, but that would make you hurt more, so I won't. Sammiches . . . oops, I can't help it.
Warmonger_Smurf 29
You wuss cracked ribs only hurt when: Laugh Cough Breath Stand up Sit down Lay down Move Hiccups There is something they don't have on C.O.D the joy of a cracked sternum after getting promoted.
AussieChild 22
I had hiccups for 3 days once. There's nothing doctors can do, they gave me a saline drip, which did nothing. I just had to wait it out.
rocker_chick105 31
A spoonful of sugar literally helps me.
AussieChild 22
I had hiccups for 3 days once. Went to the doctor and they tried a drip which didn't work, and then told me to wait it out. Just try to relax and not focus on it- it'll pass eventually
coconutdaydream 7
My grandad once hiccuped for a week- went to hospital and got electric shock treatment and it stopped. An hour later on the bus ride home it started again.. Finally stopped a few days later but he barely slept or ate anything the whole time and got sent home from work. Strange how something most people don't even think about can case such a problem! But I'm sure you will be fine- count yourself lucky it's only a few hours!!
coconutdaydream 7
Get well soon though OP- cracked ribs sounds horrible
jesustitts 20
Hiccups are actually your diaphragm contracting.
DocBastard 40
Go to the ER and request an ER doc who knows what the **** he's doing (I'll warn you: THEY ARE RARE), and request some Thorazine. Yes, Thorazine, the anti-psychotic medicine. If you don't believe me, look it up. Thorazine is fairly effective for refractory hiccoughs.
drkrissy1331 12
We are all NOT that bad!!! Ok, A LOT are, but there are a few of us who are great!
arrianna147 0
Lean your head back and swallow 3 times, realigns your esophagus..
winkydog4056 16
Down a teaspoon of sugar (REAL sugar, none of that artificial sweetener shit), hold breath for 10 seconds. Done.