Today, I had to go down to the county police department to bail out my kids who thought it would be a good idea to try mugging an ice cream truck driver. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was teaching my 4 year-old daughter about "stranger danger" and how to deal with it. Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML
Today, I heard the ice cream truck. Being the idiot that I am, I ran down the steps and almost immediately fell down them. I needed four stitches. I didn't even get my ice cream. FML
Today, I had to go to the police station to pick up my 42 year-old dad. Why? He was caught stealing candy. FML
Today, I thought it was about time to learn to ride a bike as an adult. I wobbled down the street, lost my balance, and crashed into a parked ice cream truck. The owner yelled at me, and I was left with a bruised ego and no ice cream. FML
Today, I was having a rough day and decided to go out for a walk at 1 a.m. to clear my head. I ended up being driven home by two cops, who thought I was prostituting myself at the truck stop. When we arrived, they had a nice conversation with my parents. FML
Today, my daughter asked for a dollar to buy ice cream from the ice cream truck while I was on my computer working. Out of my wallet she took a fifty dollar bill. The ice cream man got a big tip before driving off. FML
Today, I had to go to the police station after my son got arrested for shoplifting 15 packs of gum. He got away with it at first, but got busted when he tried to return it all because he "didn't like the flavor". FML
Today, I got pulled over and ticketed while taking cookies to the local police station. FML
Today, as I was walking home, three burly men suddenly began to approach me. Thinking they were going to mug me, I reached for my pocketknife and said, "Stay away, I have a knife." Turns out they just wanted directions to an ice cream shop for their daughters, who were now bawling their eyes out. FML
Today, I volunteered to go get ice cream if I could use my mother's car. She told me to be VERY careful. Not ten minutes later, I hit a deer, which got up and walked off as though nothing had happened. FML
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Top comments
drunkonduty247 1
Why bail them out?
Dblocker 18
I guess the kids never thought that trucks can go faster than them huh?
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Comments (190)
EnterSandman_fml 20
Yet another explanation of why Sweet Tooth is the way he is.
cuppycakeslove 20
Those spongebob popsicles are irresistable...
Bluekaren16 19
They should have mugged an ice cream cart. That way it would not escape as easily.
stormchaser24 24
Do they play Grand Thief Auto by any change?
gabe222 25
Theft* Chance* Sheesh, if you are going to make a game reference, get the name right.
DontThumbMeDown 8
Most likely autocorrect
spacemanspiff78 7
Why bail them out? A couple nights in jail might be a good cure for dumbassitis.
j_cat187 20
But what about the crazy man comming down from heroin?
spacemanspiff78 7
More motivation for a career change. No good being a stick up man if a junky in withdrawal can take you down.
olpally 33
Maybe they mugged the one who was annoyed by the music on his ice cream truck after two weeks, and decided to put him out of his misery by mugging him... Lol.
Bluekaren16 19
But the ice cream truck got away and the music will continue playing.
Bluekaren16 19
But the ice cream truck got away and the music will continue playing.
kimg0885 23
You beat me to it, I was thinking the same. Poor ice cream guy, like the music wasn't bad enough? It's ok though, there's an ice cream man union, well more like a gang, but they will have their revenge. Guess who's getting that nasty frost bitten/ melted then refrozen choco taco?
vladmire 4
This takes stupidity to a whole new level...
Kiki242 19
Should have left them there for a few days.
rooney0710 5
Because he wet after an ice-cream truck he's probably a fat kid who asked for ice cream and couldn't run from the cops for a block because he was out of breath. Obesity is a huge problem
AlexaWuzHere 31
Since when does a little kid have to be obese to love ice cream?
SammyS2012 21
I still chase the ice cream truck.
Keep_It_Hot99 8
As do I
Kyle225 3
Give them poor kids some money to buy ice cream..YDI