Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that miles are the same distance for everything. He thought that human miles were different than mouse miles, because they're smaller. He's 34. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to explain to my 22-year-old boyfriend that mice do not grow up to be rats. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend didn’t know what quotation marks are. He’s 34. FML
Today, I had to explain to my husband that the Earth is not flat. He didn’t believe me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I spent 30 minutes listening to my grandmother telling us that my cat is a medium. My boyfriend is totally convinced. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were furniture shopping. They had miniature versions built of some of the desks. He commented how they were "cute for little kids" to use. They were 6 inches tall. I had to explain to him that they were only models, not real desks. I'm dating Zoolander. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a very thoughtful gift: A pair of woolen socks, hand-knitted by his mom. They were a size 43. Yes, that’s his size. I wear a 36. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boss that DVI ports are not the same as HDMI ports. When I showed him the HDMI cable, he said, "Oh! You mean USB!" He's an engineering manager. FML
Today, I had to find simple words to explain to the idiot I was tutoring that "1/4" is not of a greater value than "1/3" just because the denominator is bigger. FML
Today, I had to explain to my husband that it's biologically impossible for cats and dogs to cross-breed, and that his "brilliant idea" of getting ours to mate is just plain disturbing. He still doesn't believe me. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why he shouldn't take drugs from strangers. I'm 35 and he's 34. FML
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Top comments
BlackHawkSavior 28
34 mouse years or 34 human years?
Tripartita 45
Damn, so when that mouse was bragging to me about running several miles, he was talking about ACTUAL miles?! That IS impressive.
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Comments (113)
MSCCG 16
Well mice probably do use a different metric to measure distance. It would be more likely that it's based on timing though, so a log scale perhaps.
nitrog100 21
Well, technically, because the foot was measured by the approximate length of a man's foot before standardization, a mouse mile could be considered the length of 5280 mouse paws.
Lotzalot 6
There are two types of miles: Topographical miles, the one in common usage and on maps; and nautical miles, the converted actual distance of a common mile over the curvature of the Earth, used for maritime and aviation purposes.
urbanbigfoot 20
damn. I'm in great shape. I can run 1 mouse mile in 25 seconds flat.