Today, I had to drive my drunk parents home from a party. They leaned out the window and barked at everyone we passed all the way home. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I had to pick up and drive home a couple of drunk bitches. Unfortunately, one of these drunk bitches was my mother. FML
Today, my parents yelled at me for coming home drunk from a party last night. They said I couldn't hang out with my best friend anymore as he's a "bad influence". He was the only one sober in our group and drove me home safely. FML
Today, I had to go pick up my mother at 3 in the morning. She had been out drinking and couldn't drive. She parties more than I do. FML
Drunk level: 2000
Today, I had to pick up my dad because he was too drunk to drive home. Drive his wheelchair home, that is. FML
He's still got it
Today, my dad got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML
Today, I had to be the designated driver for my mom and aunt. While driving them home, my aunt threw up on the car floor and my mom peed her pants, leaving a puddle in the seat. It was my car. FML
Today, I went out drinking with my friends. Being safe as we were a little intoxicated, we took a taxi back. The cab driver was also drunk. FML
Kid!
Today, a really drunk couple staggered into the store I work at. One of them yelled at me, "Hey you! Kid! Tell us where the booze is at!" This would have been funny if these people weren't my parents. FML
Family values
Today, I went back home. My drunk mother was screaming at my drunk step-dad about a fight that happened four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "orgasm face", while the neighbors were dancing outside, coked out and naked. FML
Get back here!
Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me!" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML
Top comments
genesisnirvana 11
your parents are a win.
Andrewlostnow 3
your lucky all my mom and dad do is purr and meow
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Comments (148)
teh1313 2
are ya sure they didn't scream penis at every 1........including the police..... no tht was my parents
coolp3rson 0
woof
MoglieHill 0
Roll the windows up?
FYLbeotches 5
woof
HeroOfTime13 0
want to trade???
ParkersGirl 0
hahaha!
BIEBERSLAYER 10
did you hit them with a newspaper?
missdestinfl2010 0
the last time my parents drank they forced me into a fancy seafood restaurant where my dad spit water on the waiters as they walked by and stuffed his face in his plate with his hands behind his back.. I'd take barking over that any day!
xRazorbladeKisSx 0
Lmao fml for not having parents like that!
babygirlc1 5
close the windows?