Today, I had the good fortune of finding a seat on the bus, not the norm in Peru. Several minutes after sitting down, I felt something on my shoulder. Thinking it was a hand, I turned my head to look. I came face to face with a dirty man's crotch, it was his erection resting on my shoulder. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, there were no more seats on the bus I was taking home, which meant I had to stand. I noticed that a creepy guy sitting in front of me had a boner, so I took a few steps back. Suddenly the bus went through something like a speed bump, which caused me to fall and sit on the man's lap. FML
Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML
Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML
Today, while I was riding the bus to work, I noticed the guy sitting across from me had shorts on. He also had no underwear on and I could fully see his "parts" just hanging there. I decided to switch seats but as I stood up to move, the bus jerked. I fell face forward right into his "parts". FML
Today, I was sitting on the bus when a good looking girl accidentally brushed her ass up against my shoulder as she walked past. This only made me realize that this has been the closest I've come to touching a girls ass in over a year. FML
Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML
Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML
Today, I saw a creepy guy grab a woman's ass on the bus, so I caught his arm and put him in an arm lock, only for the woman to hit me in the head with her handbag. Turns out they were a married couple on their way home to have sex, and who couldn't resist a quick grope during the journey. FML
Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs and the next seat. FML
Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML
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Top comments
nodbor 11
even dicks need a place to rest.
Narsh 0
How could anyone possibly say that you deserved this? FYL indeed.
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Comments (210)
mf_fml 0
i would throw-up in my mouth. not even a little, a whoooooole lot. "not cool, dude."
onigiriqueen 0
Gross! Definitely a FYL!!!
lulzorz 0
that fact that people clicked you deserved it to someone who got a boner rested upon them out of the blue for no reason in the world cracks me up a lot more than the actual FML...hahahaha
hellz_angel 0
That is messed up.... You know people on those buses don't shower as much either =/ but I agree FYL (not to mention I think its cool you're in Peru; mainly because I am Peruvian) =]
SpicyDuck 22
It's not very cool to stereotype bus riders like that.
DarksideDoll 31
All people who ride the bus are unhygienic? Since when was this a fact?
nimaisha 0
I've experienced that before... in Africa. No boundaries.. no respect for women. Men everywhere are gross.
xobeachbabe 0
That sounds pretty hard to believe
rainyday1010 0
Haha, you know, my mom said that while she lived in Peru, the buses were so crowded that she was always crushed against the window. ... You should have punched his crotch or something, jesus christ. If someone did that to me I would hit them.
RebeccaRFT 18
Why? When it's something they can't control? You're an asshole. If he found her attractive, he got hard and that's all. He didn't do anything to her. It's his actions that determine whether he deserves to be hit or not. And sometimes guys can get erections because of friction.
Superadie 0
You should have sprayed his thingie with tear gas to learn him respect! Yeech, gross!
YakuzaxGeneralz 9
thingi?
wwvmd 0
Wow..... seriously f-ed up.. and everyone that says they would hit them are lying because in reality you would probably be so in shock you wouldn't know what the f to do.. Jesus man.. FYL
goathumpy 0
Well you obviously have sexy shoulders. Take it as a compliment.