Today, I had surgery on my "girl parts" and can't have sex for six weeks. My boyfriend sees no need to spend any time with me until I heal up. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, three weeks after a traumatic emergency cesarean section, my husband keeps sulking because sex is the literal last thing I want right now. The fact that my body is still sore and healing is apparently irrelevant when he is horny. FML
Today, my fiancé and I were fooling around when his foreskin ripped and bled all over the place. After a trip to the emergency room, the doctor told us no sex for six weeks to let it heal. We're getting married and going on our honeymoon in two weeks. FML
Today, I found out that I need a hysterectomy. When I told my boyfriend of 2 years, he broke up with me, because he didn't have time to "coddle my feelings". FML
Today, I got to see my fiancé for the first time in 3 months. While we were having sex for the first time, he slipped out and slammed into the back of my vagina, tearing it open. Now I won't stop bleeding, it hurts to pee, and we can't have sex. I won't see him for another 2 months after this. FML
Today, I was supposed to leave for Switzerland for a month, to see my boyfriend whom I haven't seen for over 6 months. Unfortunately, I broke my leg three days ago and I now I need to stay home and get surgery. FML
Today, I had surgery on my foot. The doctor told me I'd be on crutches for 6 months. I texted my boyfriend the news, promising lots of intimate favors if he'd watch movies with me while on bed rest for the next week. He texted back, "No way. I don't date cripples." Dumped for a broken foot. FML
Today, I just had surgery and my wife finally wants to have sex. Not that there haven't been enough other days in the previous years of marriage… FML
Today, I was rushed to the emergency room in crippling pain, thanks to a very dangerous cluster of cysts on my ovaries that could rupture at any time. My boyfriend took this news as my way of denying him sex and broke up with me for "going to obscene lengths" to emasculate him. FML
Today, my best friend of 12 years traveled cross country to help me recover from major surgery. I've been sitting in the hospital by myself while she has sex in my empty apartment with some guy she met. FML
Today, I just had knee surgery which has put me on crutches for 6 weeks. I fell on my ass after washing my hands after using the bathroom. Ashamed, my boyfriend and father had to pick me up. I destroyed the towel rack, ripping it of the wall. All this pain is now potentially for nothing. It's day 4 post operation. FML
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Top comments
MrDanimal 0
As soon as you heal up, injure his man parts. I think that's only fair. Then ignore him for six weeks.
rachii 0
Sucks to be you. Oh well, find someone who doesn't just want you for sex.
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Comments (163)
Driveshaft 5
I can think of at least 3 things immediately that don't involve the "girl parts". oh! 4! wait! 17! uhm actually #16 may not be legal in this country...
pisspot 0
You chose him. Bwah Hahahahahaha!
kisseshugsdrugs 5
you say boyfriend, i think you actually mean FUCKBUDDY. he obviously doesn't care about anything else.
lizzieislovely 11
Time for a new boyfriend!
The_Cardinal 0
He's an idiot. You can still make sandwiches.
January8 5
dump. dump now.
Hardbone 0
Where you trying to get fake boobs or a tight pu***??
4evermossin 0
tell him you'll suck him off .... he'll still talk to you then
VoiceOfRizhome 1
DTMFA
justintime66451 2
tell him to kick rocks, what a tool