Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he said "I love you, baby." I told him to go deeper, but instead of doing so, he decided to completely kill the mood by stopping and saying it again in a Barry White type voice. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. In the heat of the moment, I said his name. He immediately stopped, gave me a deadly serious look and said "Huh? What?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML
Today, while having sex, I told my boyfriend that I loved him. I could feel him go soft inside me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Attempting to make things a little more exciting, I said in my sexiest voice, "Oh yeah, harder." My boyfriend who apparently doesn't like talking dirty, pulled out and angrily said, "I was trying, what more do you want?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were on the phone. He started talking dirty, and saying how horny he was, etc. So I decided to play along and said, "I want you to picture me naked, baby." All of a sudden I heard a huge sigh. He responded, "Ew, that just killed it." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
micahsmommy 13
Perhaps he was hoping you'd say "I love you" back rather than "go deeper".
mikeymayhem_87 15
You did say go deeper, you just didn't specify how! Lol
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (176)
yuggi1 11
Lol. I love you, OP.
airforce987 20
Haha! Silly boyfriend! Barry White wasn't in Inception!
LolFMLnot 10
You are one lucky girl to have a guy like that. He sounds fun, agh i am jealous :(
FurryPride 9
For those who don't get it he used that tone of voice because it's deep.
biggestfan23 11
#36 don't sound so down there are many fish in the sea
LolFMLnot 10
64 thanks , but i want nemo :(
blackheart24 10
64- there's also crabs if you're not careful.
yanksby7 6
Yeah...OP has a boyfriend who loves her, has a sense of humor and is having sex with her. OP, you are a drama queen looking for a fight. Tell your boy to come talk to me when he's tired of your bs.
iBanana 17
Maybe OP killed the mood by replying in a sloppy **** star phrase. I mean, it does sound sexy, but your boyfriend was displaying emotion; and no, not the deep kind.
idntwannaknow 3
-78 Th
idntwannaknow 3
I didn't mean type that comment lol
TheBonzaiGirl 0
No #98 it actually makes sense: -78 degrees Hectaheit is the temperature that the element Thorium (Th) solidifies at. Since Thorium is found in cloudberries, which are white berries (a play on words of "Barry White"), your comment was obviously a well thought out and easily identifiable reference to the FML. Bravo, bravo
aaahhhfire21 0
Cue Austin powers music " I thank u"
chasemoehlman 1
Lol
cobaltss06 1
82- if your a girl you sound like a good gf :)
Derwinx 2
lolwut?
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
Oh. At first I thought Op meant Barry from 'storage wars'. I was like: WTF...
micahsmommy 13
Perhaps he was hoping you'd say "I love you" back rather than "go deeper".
hinchkongfang 0
Don't call it "making love" if you can't say the words... Just call it rooting or screwing or something...
Feared 9
I like his approach at a joke, but I would have done things differently. If you were to say go deeper, I would say deeper things rather than just "I love you".
MizzErikaHart 8
Rooting, lol
RadioOctopus 16
WAHAHAHAA like #101 Trolololololololo
spacemanspiff78 7
What is "go deeper?" She think he's only using his small wang and he's got a bigger one hidden?
hinchkongfang 0
Rooting is a great Australian term :)
cc_the_beast 6
^ I love both the word and the act. It's also funny when yanks ask 'who do you root for?'
Glidefedt 6
Also, Barry White is awesome.
GirlYouNasty 11
Today, while I was making love to my girlfriend, I whispered, "I love you, baby." Her only reply was "go deeper." FML
amy1_1bee 0
Yep Aussies Like me love it lol
Michaelsgirl04 9
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
wow...that really sucks op but that was wayyyy tmi O_O
KeyboardWarrior 10
Then get off this website, you're too young for it.
Michaelsgirl04 9
actually I'm not. I just don't like hearing details of other people's sex. forgive me
Shenannigoats 16
No.
betterNowThanLat 5
if i may add, just saying "go deeper" isnt much detail. how would that be tmi?
betterNowThanLat 5
Be**
soccerguy2 11
I think 3 was born in 2004 cause her username says 04.
_Oblivion_ 12
Bitch, no one is gunna change how they do things just so you* are happy. Don't like it? Get off the site or just sit your ass in the corner with all the other people and just ignore it. Tmi, psh
betterNowThanLat 5
maybe because for someone to react like that to OP just telling her man to go deeper, is a sign of immaturity because thats not detail at all ..
Furrywhiplash 14
People like getting too much information when it comes to the intimacy category on FML. Some people even get aroused... Not that I would know...
Michaelsgirl04 9
jeez people. I'm 19. the 04 in my username isn't the year I was born. sorry it just rubbed me the wrong way. I'll keep my comments to myself next time. no need to call me a bitch. I apologize if I came off as one
_Oblivion_ 12
I just see people as annoying idiots until they explain themselves. It's good, no hard feelings.
chane1100 6
Welcome to the internet. Shit gets crazy all up in here!
effedml 5
Aww, Michaelsgirl. Why did you apologize? Stand up for yourself. Your opinion was valid.
babe7260 30
No shit eh?
ladyLALAA 29
I say not enough information!
rocoskewl14 3
Agreed.
RedPillSucks 33
This is the "Intimacy" section. Did you really think there wouldn't be any detail? Don't open Pandora's box if you're afraid to look inside.
johnnyhaha 0
I was 100th to downvote
TunechiXXL 0
119 - I conquer.......
jroxursox1 10
That's the point of FML is to get TMI.
mikeymayhem_87 15
You did say go deeper, you just didn't specify how! Lol
R3TROxLOV3 32
Well it's still kind of weird for him to lower the pitch of his voice...
peteyfas 8
Yeah..unfortunately this sounds like something I would do in bed. Sometimes I can't help it if the joke is worth it.
Michaelsgirl04 9
oy. I didn't get the joke til it was pointed out...whoops. well I feel like a dunderhead now
twisted_cherub 14
I find people who can laugh in bed awesome to be with. My boyfriend and I laugh sometimes. Sex is supposed to be two (or more, if you like that) people enjoying each other's bodies. There's no rule saying those people must be serious the whole time.
MsBHaven 8
hear, hear! ..would prob 'alter' the moment for me.. but that unexpected response would def be worth it! lol.. have a giggle then carry on/start again. Definitely not a FML..
Mama_Umbridge 8
Austin Powers is hilarious! Laugh it up!
Vanilla1Thrilla 0
"HOW DOES THAT FEEL, BABY?" "Mmm... lower!" "how does that feel, baby?" Haha!
vampiresam9097 5
UMBRIDGE!!!! You're my new favorite FMLer!!
ArrickMorris 4
That just made my ******* night
cheesecakex 5
Haha, I love a guy with a sense of humour xD
The_Hitdude 12
Well....he listened to you. Which is more than a lot of people can say about their spouses.
TheDrifter 24
I wonder what voice he would have done if you'd said deeper again?
The_Hitdude 12
Darth Vader voice....*ccccchhhhht* I'll love you...if you join me on the Dark Side!
RedPillSucks 33
Then a black guy jumps into bed with them for a surprise three-some.
TheThree 0
Win!
mackischillin 5
Morgan freeman, though nobody can do it as well as Morgan does
perdix 31
Were you ******* Reverend Jim? (What does a yellow light mean? Look it up.)
Halti 4
legend
StreetReaper 9
Great comment, however the average FML user is WAY too young to understand it.
perdix 31
#68, you may be right, but "Who's on First?" was way before my time, but my elders led me to it. I'm just passing the torch on this comedy gem.
DocBastard 40
Wait wait wait...how the hell does Barry White kill the mood? That man was an aphrodisiac!
l0v3p4in 7
Barry White didn't kill the mood. OP's boyfriend stopping in the middle killed the mood, especially if he was going at her fast and she was about to hit the big O.