Today, I had a very long, complicated talk with my girlfriend. Apparently, since she isn't religious, she doesn't have to give anyone Christmas presents, and yet expects everyone to give her some. She then told me what I should get her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, because it was our first Christmas as a couple, I was careful to get my girlfriend what I considered to be a very thoughtful gift. She opened it, took one look at it, made a face like I'd just kicked a puppy, and told me that in future it would be better if I just gave her money so she could buy her own presents. FML
Today, I've been considering breaking up with my girlfriend so I don't have to buy her a Christmas present. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She then proceeded to ask for all the gifts she gave me for Christmas back. FML
Today, after buying my girlfriend a $700 bracelet for Christmas, I hinted that I wanted a pair of Oakleys. She told me I shouldn't get her anything and that I should expect even less. FML
Today, I bought my girlfriend a very expensive necklace. I gave it to her thinking she'd be extremely happy. Instead she was mad at me because my gift for our anniversary was better than hers. FML
Today, my girlfriend is locked in the bathroom crying because I didn't buy her anything for Valentine's Day, even though Friday, at her suggestion, we agreed not to exchange gifts because both of our birthdays are a week away. FML
Today, after I spent quite some time getting thoughtful gifts for my friend and her kids ahead of their visit, she made a big fuss about how she'd "forgotten" to bring the gift she'd bought for me. Later, she casually admitted that she'd intentionally not bought me anything because she, "didn't think I'd need it." FML
Today, my girlfriend came home and announced that she'd just bought a $40 pair of flipflops. She then declared that I wouldn't be getting a birthday gift this year due to budget shortfalls. For hers a month prior, I'd got her a $300 piece of jewelry. FML
Today, I thought my mom and I could put aside our differences and open our Christmas presents. When she opened mine, she turned to my dad and said she didn't want the present, so I could give it to someone else. 'Tis the season. FML
Today, my wife asked me to wrap an empty box to put under the Christmas tree. She didn't want her vlog followers to think she didn't get me any gifts. FML
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Top comments
ThatGenericGuy 6
Get her a bible :)
ChampionKO 6
a hard *******????
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Comments (309)
yuggi1 11
Stand up for yourself. Tell her that you will only give her presents if she gives in return. Dollar store items don't count!
kimono_fml 17
don't waste your time with a selfish bimbo
sucks2BEyouu 0
Buy that b***h a muzzle, and tell her to stop being so fricken needy.
steve247 2
A one way train ticket
Spinnmaster 1
To hell?????
Spinnmaster 1
To hell?????
MoonPhase123 4
U
MwahFMLS 6
Ho Ho Ho. :)
boycrazy30007 12
More like hoe hoe hoe if you ask me
leadman1989 16
58 - Just GTFO. -_-
natashax21 5
Oh shut up. Pretty much everyone celebrates Christmas regardless of religion. Don't take her B.S.
melikeyturtles 3
Except Jews. They have Hanukkuh!
Mauskau 36
Not sure about muslims I know my friend doesn't
mhayes119_fml 0
You should give her a punch to a face!
natashax21 5
A face? What face are you referring to sir?
sydie5 12
She's getting coal for Christmas.
Discombobulated9 12
Give her a great big smack in the face. If she tries to return the gesture, remind her that she isn't supposed to be giving you anything for Christmas.
DelphiCat 17
Really, DO NOT buy her anything! and possibly dump her for being a dick, and/or a complete idiot! Christmas isn't even about religion anymore, its about family and friends and something to look forward to in crappy winter, so not being religious is so not a reason to not buy presents...
Bekll 31
... Why do you say winter is crappy? It's my favorite season, especially when it snows.
melikeyturtles 3
And Christmas will always be somewhat religious as long as it has "Christ" in it & the star on top of the tree.
ohsheet 8
Dump her ass...she's not worth it. And yes, Christmas is still about religion. We're celebrating the birth of Jesus...but it is also about the gathering of family and friends.
DeWane 0
hey I am an atheist but I still want it to be called christmas because that's just what I've alway called it and the star stays because the tree don't like right otherwise
ohsheet 8
195- don't get me wrong!-i'm not saying that you have to be religious to celebrate christmas...but the reason for christmas is to celebrate the birth of jesus christ (thats what chrismas is). I'm not the kind of person who forces religion down people's throat...im just saying what i believe in
ohsheet 8
195-Sorry! i just realized you were probably not talking to me!
ellabella1987 0
Christmas isnt about religion anymore?! CHRIST-mas! Your just as dumb as OP's b*tch.
bizarre_ftw 22
167 - actually, as it were the man that was named Jesus christ was born at a far different date, historians have proven this to be true, we just keep Christmas where it is because we want to, so clearly this holiday has split from the religion from whence it came (also, fun fact: every time you see a classical painting of a white guy on a cross you're seeing racism as there is no possible way for that guy to've been born where he was and be that white)
bizarre_ftw 22
Ohsheet - be proud of your gingerdom, I wish I was one, they truly are the superior subspecies of human
docscientist 10
218- simply because it's In the name, doesn't make it's meaning is rigid and interpretable in only one way. Don't be a jackass.
ohsheet 8
224-i HATE being a redhead...it sucks. I like being an individual, just not in that way
bizarre_ftw 22
Oh come on! Red heads are awesome!!! I envy you guys so much!!!!