Today, I bought my girlfriend a very expensive necklace. I gave it to her thinking she'd be extremely happy. Instead she was mad at me because my gift for our anniversary was better than hers. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I asked my girlfriend about a diamond necklace I bought her for her birthday, which she didn't seem to be wearing. She then told me she hocked it to pay for her inexpensive phone bill. I paid $1,500 for that necklace, she received $300 from the pawn shop. FML
Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday, so I decided to take her to a fancy restaurant and give her an expensive $400 necklace that I had bought. Being traditional, I asked the waiter to arrange it nicely on the tray when he came with our dessert. Neither he nor the necklace ever showed up. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that the necklace I gave her wasn't a "unique enough gift." I spent two weeks making that necklace, link by link. FML
Today, I gave my wife a $900 necklace as a special Christmas gift. She gave me a set of Star Wars pajamas. As it turns out, I was more excited to wear my gift than she was to wear hers. FML
Today, for our 2-year anniversary, I bought my girlfriend a beautiful $400 necklace. She bought me a pink $5 shirt of Elton John riding a piano through space. FML
Today, after buying my girlfriend a $700 bracelet for Christmas, I hinted that I wanted a pair of Oakleys. She told me I shouldn't get her anything and that I should expect even less. FML
Today, I found out that the necklace my boyfriend gave me for my birthday was actually a gift he'd given to his ex-girlfriend. FML
Today, my girlfriend came home and announced that she'd just bought a $40 pair of flipflops. She then declared that I wouldn't be getting a birthday gift this year due to budget shortfalls. For hers a month prior, I'd got her a $300 piece of jewelry. FML
Today, because it was our first Christmas as a couple, I was careful to get my girlfriend what I considered to be a very thoughtful gift. She opened it, took one look at it, made a face like I'd just kicked a puppy, and told me that in future it would be better if I just gave her money so she could buy her own presents. FML
Today, I found out that my ex gifted a special handcrafted necklace I made for him to his new girlfriend. She wears it on all her socials. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ollie179 21
Get her something nice, she's angry. Get her something shit or nothing, she's angry. You can't win.
Antoine_Dodson 0
Bitches be crazy.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (124)
firelight619 0
Some people just aren't as grateful...
fabian21 0
At least she didn't break it into piece by thinking it was a roach. (Earlier FML reference)
enonymous 9
Whoa guy code infraction... We are not allowed to remember birthdays, anniversaries and how to drive to the mother in laws house. Next time do what I do. Take her to a nice fancy restaurant, let her supersize and she can have 1 monopoly game piece... As long as it's not park place...
nublets 12
21- or boardwalk, dont forget the boardwalk!
cbdee 8
u sure know a good time 21!
Stalkers 0
If she doesn't want it then go return it and give her something that isn't as good.
dre_bro11 12
OP, are you the same guy who left your gf 'ticketless' at the movies? If so, I can see why!
mario3584 0
That's what I would do
Alex94xela 0
Op should have asked for a ******* or something so her gift would have been better
enonymous 9
52 - I set the bar pretty high. I know the only necklaces I give my partner does not come from a jewelry store.
pip74205 9
And if your present had been worse than hers, she STILL would have yelled at you.
Jigsaw2126 6
fuc k barca
Antoine_Dodson 0
Bitches be crazy.
MrBoredGuy 1
Snitches be lazy
MrBoredGuy 1
Well my comment posted twice, my bad
slushpup9696 12
Witches be hazy.
PSQ91 6
Bridges be glazy
Wicked361 8
I think the proper saying is Bitches be Trippin
jacob128 4
#35 im going to infer your white completely based on your comment
Federgirl 19
#2 I agree!
ollie179 21
Get her something nice, she's angry. Get her something shit or nothing, she's angry. You can't win.
hiLife808 0
I agree with #3, there's no winning with girls. That's why you need to get yourself woman OP cause they don't play mind games.
hiLife808 0
*a woman
False_Stupidity 42
Oh yes they do...
BobsUrAunty 2
women are worse. they've had more time and practice to hone their skills lol
capilot 10
#3 speaks truth. I took a girl for a week in Bora Bora once, and she got mad because I didn't plan anything romantic during our 4-hour layover between flights on the way home. Your best policy: break up with your girlfriend just before holiday season and find a new girlfriend after valentine's day.
Ravenclaw2016 6
81 - Getting mad over something like that is ridiculous, who the **** expects some elaborate plan at an airport layover? But that "best policy" is also shit. I sincerely hope that part was a joke.
popcorned 0
Dump her, she's angry. But for the last time. :) !!
Fukk_fml 0
Trueeee :/
prince122 0
Bitches never satisfied... Always Go with the my dick in a box.
nublets 12
Like a boss.
Badab1ng 5
That's what shy Ronnie would do anyways.
Velocirahptor 6
kill her in in her sleep
StoryOfTheYear 15
Intelligence is key.
HollyoaksFan93 9
A bit extreme?
hebron77 0
I like that idea. I know a place off the coast by Florida we could dump the body.
tsim_fml 0
This is when you close your eyes, pucker up, reach your arms out for a hug and say "Love you!" Works everytime.
TKmax 5
Love it
spicerack1528 3
A new pearl one might be able to quell her anger, if not at least you'll feel better
borkchop1992 15
ungreatful biatch
tsim_fml 0
***ungrateful bitch***
hyden121 2
Dump the ungrateful idiot.
Aim_Low 4
On the bright side, you can always tell her it's her Christmas gift as well...