Today, I had a very long, complicated talk with my girlfriend. Apparently, since she isn't religious, she doesn't have to give anyone Christmas presents, and yet expects everyone to give her some. She then told me what I should get her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, because it was our first Christmas as a couple, I was careful to get my girlfriend what I considered to be a very thoughtful gift. She opened it, took one look at it, made a face like I'd just kicked a puppy, and told me that in future it would be better if I just gave her money so she could buy her own presents. FML
Today, I've been considering breaking up with my girlfriend so I don't have to buy her a Christmas present. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She then proceeded to ask for all the gifts she gave me for Christmas back. FML
Today, after buying my girlfriend a $700 bracelet for Christmas, I hinted that I wanted a pair of Oakleys. She told me I shouldn't get her anything and that I should expect even less. FML
Today, I bought my girlfriend a very expensive necklace. I gave it to her thinking she'd be extremely happy. Instead she was mad at me because my gift for our anniversary was better than hers. FML
Today, my girlfriend is locked in the bathroom crying because I didn't buy her anything for Valentine's Day, even though Friday, at her suggestion, we agreed not to exchange gifts because both of our birthdays are a week away. FML
Today, after I spent quite some time getting thoughtful gifts for my friend and her kids ahead of their visit, she made a big fuss about how she'd "forgotten" to bring the gift she'd bought for me. Later, she casually admitted that she'd intentionally not bought me anything because she, "didn't think I'd need it." FML
Today, my girlfriend came home and announced that she'd just bought a $40 pair of flipflops. She then declared that I wouldn't be getting a birthday gift this year due to budget shortfalls. For hers a month prior, I'd got her a $300 piece of jewelry. FML
Today, I thought my mom and I could put aside our differences and open our Christmas presents. When she opened mine, she turned to my dad and said she didn't want the present, so I could give it to someone else. 'Tis the season. FML
Today, my wife asked me to wrap an empty box to put under the Christmas tree. She didn't want her vlog followers to think she didn't get me any gifts. FML
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Top comments
ThatGenericGuy 6
Get her a bible :)
ChampionKO 6
a hard *******????
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Comments (309)
iluvcupkakes 0
That crazy bitch! Jk but that's messed up
Werman20 4
^Christmas is about religion but still she is a selfish dumb bitch. Dump her please.
geekemo92 0
No, not anymore. A lot of people don't actually celebrate it as the birth of Christ. A lot of people celebrate it as the commercial/family holiday that it is.
bizarre_ftw 22
Look, I see it as being two, or both, ways. In both religion is ******** itself 1) all major religions came from the same origin (which they did) 2) no one gives a damn about god and the religions were coordinated so the major gift giving holidays came at the same general time. Which seems more likely? (take into consideration bloody Mary, the inquisition, actual celibate priests, nuns, etc..)
The_Great_Zucchi 15
Yes because giving huge amounts of presents at Christmas is obviously based on a long Christian tradition that goes back centuries and not mostly on smart marketing by some corporations...
hateevryone 15
don't buy her a damn thing. dumb bitch
Savra_fml 17
What will happen if you don't get the gift? She will give you the "silent treatment"? If you get her something, she will have you wrapped around her little finger....and so YDI. If you rebel, and tell her kindly to go **** herself, maybe she will respect you for making a stand. Inadvertedly she is giving you a Christmas present by letting you grow a pair....and so FHL. Relationships are about give and take, make her understand that....or FYL.
raphanne_fml 33
"Love is based of giving and receiving, as well as having and sharing. And the love that they give and have is shared and received. And through this having and giving and sharing and receiving, we too can share and love and have... and receive."
Savra_fml 17
59, How you doin'?
raphanne_fml 33
- We're going to London, babe! - That's not going to get annoying...
brittiney21 0
wow never herd that before... that's ****** selfish I would get her anything
Savra_fml 17
I think you just outsmarted yourself there...personally since it's selfish of her, I "wouldn't" get her anything.
ikickgingers 15
I "herd" that.
Rainbow_dumpster 28
...and that's when you flip her off and say, "It's over".
ILoveTabz 0
What a bitch
KiddNYC1O 22
Tell her it's a two-way street.
gogirls 3
u mean ex-girlfriend right!?