Today, I realized that the root of my depression is that I hate being a mom. l love my two boys but I barely function taking care of myself due to years of abuse. My 6 year-old and 8 month-old have me constantly overstimulated to the point I enjoy nothing anymore. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I have to admit that while I do love my children I absolutely fucking hate being a mom. I hate that I’ve completely lost my identity to motherhood. I don’t even feel like a person anymore. Just an invisible servant and nothing more. I didn’t know it would be like this. FML
Today, and ever since I gave birth to my son, I’ve hated being a mom. I held him, waiting for the rush of love my mom told me I’d feel and… nothing, I was completely emotionless about holding my newborn son and it’s gotten worse. I really hate being a mom, and my husband just does not understand. FML
Today, I approached my mother for comfort, because I've been feeling depressed and unloved by anyone lately. She replied, “Honestly, I stopped loving you back when you were a toddler.” FML
Today, due to some serious health and financial issues, I literally have no choice but to have my mom watch my kids. She's turned my son into the most spoiled insufferable brat, I can’t stand it. Then I feel like I’m punishing him at home for what his grandmother enforces in hers. I don't know what to do. FML
Today, I have a family but I just feel all alone and unloved, almost on the verge of depression. I just wanna cry. My wife is always threatening me with divorce and says she can’t stand the sight of me, and my son hates me. I just wanna feel like somebody is there for me and that I can lean on someone else. FML
Today, I found out that my kids hate and are actively ignoring me; my wife is bipolar and she swears she hates me too after over 20 years of marriage, and my job sucks the life out of me every single day. FML
Today, I'm so sick of being a mom. I have a screaming toddler and a squalling infant, tearing up the house and stinking up every room, and my husband still has the balls to not only be happy, but ask for ANOTHER. I'm about to walk, dump the kids with his smiley ass, and take his rich family's money. FML
Today, I kind of wished I'd never become a stepmom. I didn't know what I was getting into. When one of the kids' moms stops making life hard, the other picks up. I love the kids with all my heart, but it's starting to hurt me. I can't give 100% because I'm reminded I'm "not their real mom." FML
Today, I spent five hours sobbing in my room due to antidepressant withdrawal. My mother refused to come and talk to me, because I'm "a terrible, hateful child who only cares about herself." Last week, I spent two hours comforting her because my brother hadn't called in a week. FML
Today, I envy all the mothers who get to hide in their bathroom, engulfed in tears, when at their breaking points. I'm a single mom of two heathens. Today, like most days, really I had to threaten violence at the top of my lungs so they would stop fighting long enough for me to simply use the bathroom. FML
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Top comments
FluffythePink 24
🫂 You need to talk to your child health worker/Dr to get help, the right drugs and therapy. It won't be an instant fix but just starting to work on straitening yourself out will help. You've probably got post partum depression on top of the depression/PTSD from the ex. Reach out for help before it effects your kids. You don't need that guilt as well as everything else you are dealing with. Please don't just sit and rot in this. Find a Mums group in your area, talk to domestic violence support groups and start moving forward. Even if it's only one single inch forward a day, just getting going in the right direction will get you to a better place 🫂
d j mom 9
I believe you could get a lot of help from a therapist. good luck
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Comments (3)
FluffythePink 24
🫂 You need to talk to your child health worker/Dr to get help, the right drugs and therapy. It won't be an instant fix but just starting to work on straitening yourself out will help. You've probably got post partum depression on top of the depression/PTSD from the ex. Reach out for help before it effects your kids. You don't need that guilt as well as everything else you are dealing with. Please don't just sit and rot in this. Find a Mums group in your area, talk to domestic violence support groups and start moving forward. Even if it's only one single inch forward a day, just getting going in the right direction will get you to a better place 🫂
d j mom 9
I believe you could get a lot of help from a therapist. good luck
Mychelle15 7
oh momma. please go seek help. it will be so much better for you and those babies. I wish you nothing but the best.