Today, I had a theatre performance. I had to put on a lot of makeup for the role, and one of the guys said I looked nice. I smiled and said thanks. Seconds later, I'd been sucker-punched by his girlfriend for "flirting" with her man. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was sword fighting in a play when I accidentally hit the other person in the head. He called me a bitch and stormed off stage, leaving me alone with an audience of 50. FML
Today, I went to go see my boyfriend of over two years in a play. I knew that he'd be kissing his female opposite at the end of the show, and I was okay with that. I snuck into his dressing room at intermission to find him "rehearsing" with her half-naked. FML
Today, while I was standing in line at the store, some guy insulted the girl in front of me as he walked past. She turned around and socked me in the face. FML
Today, I decided to not wear makeup for the first time. My boyfriend asked me if I got punched in the face. FML
Today, I was out when a guy walking with his girlfriend eyed me up. I made a shocked face at him and kept walking. The next thing I knew, his girlfriend was beating the shit out of me claiming that I was "the other woman." I'd never seen the guy before in my life. FML
Today, I got punched in the face, had hair ripped out of my skull and broke a tooth on the pavement when I fell. Some guy mistook me for someone else. FML
Today, I was at the movies with my boyfriend, when I had to go pee. Halfway down the aisle, I tripped, screamed, and fell face-first into some guy. My boyfriend is now accusing me of cheating and "flirting" with every man I see. FML
Today, I was walking down the street to go to the movies, when I got punched in the back of the head. When I turned around, a stranger said, "HAHA! It's punch a random person day!" When I asked him why he chose me, he replied "You're ugly." FML
Today, I went to the movies with my girlfriend. As I started putting my arm around her, I hit her in the face. FML
Today, I dropped in on my wife at her part time waitressing job. As I was leaving, I gave her tushie a playful squeeze. I was then tackled by some acne-ridden teenage blockhead trying to impress the hot waitress by beating up the guy groping her. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
nesteremily 31
Punch her back, explain later.
moophasa 19
Seriously? What a bitch
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (79)
vikky538 29
Looks like she is a OPB. Over Possessive Bitch
DrCheese 16
Everyone visits the buffet of crazy. Some take a little, some take a lot. But the point is every woman visits the buffet.
DrCheese 16
Every woman***
Kierans 5
What play was it?
Kramer1998 20
Some people are just stupidly jealous
mrjc 8
Bitches be crazy.
gabagabaheyu 10
you beat her ass right?
WhoCouldIBe 11
At least you can cover it with the makeup
lefsetang 15
I find it kind of sad that, in today's society, giving a simple compliment is considered flirting. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being nice to someone and making them feel good about themselves.
MrHi7093 3
I'm with everyone else, give her a good smack in the mouth.
gogo44444 28
Lol I'd punch the bitch