Today, I had a sip of my coffee and felt a lump of some kind enter my mouth. I thought it was a bit of biscuit, and then remembered I didn't have biscuits this morning with my coffee. I took it out of my mouth and it was a huge black fly. I then spat the rest of my coffee all over my laptop. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was drinking coffee at work, while being surrounded by a lot of flies in the area I was working. Later, in the evening, I found a fly under my bottom denture plate. It'd been there for about 12 hours. FML
Today, I took a swig of lemonade from my cup, only to feel something hard in my mouth. Thinking it was a roach or something, I freaked out and spat out the drink. I doused my laptop and soaked myself in the process, only to find out it was a small ice-cube. FML
Today, I was sitting at the computer when this really annoying fly kept landing on the keyboard. After a while, I took the bottom of a pen and squished it. Twenty minutes later I absentmindedly started chewing at the bottom of the pen. FML
Today, I just drank a sip of beer and felt something so I spit it out... It was an earwig. FML
Today, at a party, a fly flew into my mouth. I spat it out, and in an effort to wash my mouth out, I grabbed the can of coke that was on the table next to me. Apparently people had been spitting in there and using it as an ashtray. FML
Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML
Today, I was making some tea for my colleagues when I accidentally dropped the tea bag into my cup of coffee. I thought, "Why not?" and took a sip. It tasted like a caffeinated botanical disaster, and the whole office got to enjoy me retch for 10 minutes. FML
Today, I coughed so much I threw up, then whilst recovering from throwing up, a fly flew into my mouth and I ate it. I then promptly threw up again. FML
Today, while I was eating, a fly kept pissing me off. After three minutes of it buzzing around, I caught it and killed it. Then, without realizing it, I smeared its guts all over the front of my shirt. FML
Today, the massive bogey that had been dangling precariously from my manager's nose for half an hour finally detached itself. Into my coffee. FML
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Top comments
DGross 8
ewww... ...at least you didn't swallow it
salty66 0
Sometimes, it's better not to think about that kind of stuff. Afterall, ignorance is bliss...
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Comments (77)
DGross 8
ewww... ...at least you didn't swallow it
mina637 0
oh my god. where did ugetthe coffee? i was just gonna run to starbucks but now...
blakehilli8 0
first1?1?
ImaginaryFoe 1
Or chew it. That would be so much worse.
DGross 8
yea, chewing it would be the worst, especially if it started to buzz around... and yea #10 but I honestly don't care about being first lol
samanthaiscool 0
roflmao! that's foul! fyl. do you even know how much pathogens and bateria are on flys that makes me want to puke they lay there eggs or larva in cow poo. sickkkk.
noobgang7 5
get free stuff from store
salty66 0
At least most of the pathogens on it would have been killed by the heat of the coffee, assuming it landed there when it was fairly hot. BTW, what did it taste like, Chicken? ;)
samanthaiscool 0
well people don't normally drink coffee at a boiling tempature so the bateria probably was not killed..
xoconnie 8
ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew theres really nothing else to say besides that. just EWWWWW. and it was worth destroying ur laptop to not eat that. or youd become the old lady that swallowed te fly
ToxicKittieh 0
The schoolbooks say it can't be here again, Chocolate Raaiinn. (side breath)
bleedinginside 0
WTF is wrong with some extra protein??
prydeboi16 0
19- I was thinking the same thing:P
M4V3R1CKR13 0
was it a mac becuase if it was fyl
Itzmeh 0
I would throw up! Flies are especially gross since they sit on dog poop and other gross stuff! D:
CountChaos 0
FTL of the fly and the laptop. OP sry but find a better FML next time
deathcab7 0
nothing like a yummy fly to go with your morning coffe! ...no. ew.
StoryOfTheYear 15
man... you have no idea how grossed out I get when something that should have no chunks (i.e. not expecting) in something that is smooth, like coffee or smoothies, cannot finish it and just chuck it usually
baby_val 0
eyew same here!!
lindsaylikeomg 0
ohhhhhhhhhhhhh my god I actually shivered in disgust while picturing this..
blankaex 0
43, if it was a Mac, then it was a YDI even without the fly.
CaptainDoorknob 7
She almost became the Old Lady who Swallowed a Fly :/. If you don't understand, then become better aquainted with Google.
xEmoFmlx 0
same happened to me.. but it was a spider and instead of coffee it was hot chocolate. that sucks D:
thikimo 0
what's wrong with a little extra protein :D
salty66 0
Sometimes, it's better not to think about that kind of stuff. Afterall, ignorance is bliss...
ashlynn610 12
OP is a girl... lol
Blur009er 0
double pwn
BM13HC 0
@7 actually its double fail, @OP, definitely FYL
sam_love8 0
gaaaag
theeBeezWaXx 0
ooh **** no!
katiebabe93 0
ewww that's gross I would have barfed
QTp13 10
My deepest sympathies are with the OP. I inhaled a spider a few days ago >.< (don't ask me how I managed that). OP, I hope the 'brommer' was not too big o_O And it is nice to see a fellow South African on FML :)
DGross 8
I've also had a bug get stuck in my ear before... one of those little gnats didn't know which way was out. It was really freaky/kinda scary hearing it buzz its wings in there :-(
QTp13 10
Awwe that sucks. It must have been quite a mission to get it out. And I can imagine that it must have been scary O.O
DGross 8
Yea, I didn't really know what to do so that made it a lot worse. I ended up putting my head down on the other ear so the bug only had to fly straight up to get out... Eventually it must have seen daylight because it flew out no harm done... just really freaky.
77_PUNKER 0
I ate cornflakes and didn't check the exp.date and I had a maggot or somekind of worming my bowl haha I still ate the cornflakes after I was starving
freudianego 0
Ja, ek ook. OP: Ag shame, dis nogals erg.
QTp13 10
ag dis nice! :) My Afrikaans is rerig nie goed nie :P Ek het in Europa en Amerika vir 'n julle paar gebly. So ek het dit nogal vergeet. Maar dis goed om jou te ontmoed :D stay in touch :)
aardvarkish 17
that's cool