Today, I had a dentist appointment after class so I threw my electric toothbrush in my backpack so I could brush my teeth before. In the middle of class the toothbrush turns on and the vibrations could be heard throughout the classroom. They yelled at me "Jess has a vibrator!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in a quiet library when I noticed a buzzing sound. I ignored it, but it kept going. I looked around, but nobody else seemed to notice. After 5 minutes of searching, I realized the buzzing was coming from my backpack. My electric toothbrush had turned itself on and was rattling around. Everyone watched me pull out a vibrating bag. FML
Today, I kept hearing a weird buzzing sound in my apartment. I turned off everything, unplugged appliances, and was on the verge of calling maintenance. Turns out, it was my electric toothbrush vibrating in my suitcase… for three hours. FML
Today, my stomach growled so loud in class that a boy sitting next to me thought his phone had vibrated. FML
Today, I sat through a dentist's appointment convinced my phone was on silent. It was not. My (loud) ringtone went off at the worst possible moment, the dentist was rattled like it was a jump-scare in a movie, and had to stop and wait while I apologised with half my face numbed and stretched open. FML
Today, I was chewing my pen while I was paying attention to my teacher. I chewed a bit too hard, and something broke off, so I casually looked at my pen. It was unharmed. One of my front teeth had broken off. Everyone in class, including the teacher, had to see it before I could call my dentist. FML
Today, in class, I reached into my bag to pull out a tampon, which I hid under my sleeve so I could make a quick escape to the restroom. My teacher yelled at me, because she thought I'd taken out my phone. I then had to prove myself by showing the tampon to the whole class. FML
Today, I needed money to go to the movie. I asked my mom if I could reach in her purse and grab a few bucks. When I opened up her purse her phone started to vibrate. I yelled over to my mom that her phone was ringing. She said the phone was next to her. I looked in the purse. It was a vibrator. FML
Today, I was giving a lecture to my class I heard a phone go off. Aggravated and exhausted, I asked everyone to turn their phones off. Then the phone rang again. I lost my shit and spent the next half hour calling my students a bunch of "technology whores". Then I realized the phone was mine. FML
Today, I was at the store with my mother in the facial care section. I found this device that scrubs your face with those anti-bacterial pads. The aisle was crowded and noisy, so I shouted to my mother, "Can I have this vibrator thing?" It went silent. FML
Today, I was talking to my mother when we both heard a continuous buzzing noise. Unable to locate the source of the noise we gave up. About an hour later, my mother yells down the stairs to me. Turns out my dog stole my vibrator, chewed it and presented it to my mother. FML
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Top comments
donkeybutts 0
you could have just showed them the toothbrush...not really fml
djse 8
I can almost hear this going down. No, you guys! It's my toothbrush! I have a dentist appointment...YOU GUYS ARE JERKS! *cry* #2 - All pulling out the toothbrush (no pun intended) woulda done is help start the rumor that Jess masturbates with her toothbrush between classes. Kids are assholes.
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Comments (68)
mobius8 0
How does you tooth brush just turn on? And yeah, like everyone else said. You could have just showed them your toothbrush and that would've been the end of that.
tibbydibby 0
Oooooo, well you got to keep your teeth clean somehow...
Loe_307 0
Ahhh yes, I remember 7th grade. Hahaha. Kids. #10 LOL love it.
rukusrazor 0
Jess = girl? or Jess = guy? Please be a guy. That would make it THAT much better.
ImTheAlpha 30
It's a girl, but if it was a guy, THAT'D BE FREAKING AWESOME! xD
ammali 0
#5, I keep thinking the same thing--all the good ones never make it, but BS like this does...
armybarbie 1
get over it.
emmaleeislamee 0
Get your roots touched up.
tsunamisurfer08 3
lol@15 But yeah, that's not THAT bad.
firstrule 0
Next time, they usually have toothbrushes you can use at the dentist's. Just a tip...
patray_angel 0
Ok, so initially that would be embarassing, it is a quick fix since all you would have to do is show it to them. You would have had to take it out to turn the thing off anyway.
aztec37 0
#4 is right. a lot of time explaining doesn't do anything. People will just make fun of you for no reason. because they are assholes and think it is funny.