Today, I had a dentist appointment after class so I threw my electric toothbrush in my backpack so I could brush my teeth before. In the middle of class the toothbrush turns on and the vibrations could be heard throughout the classroom. They yelled at me "Jess has a vibrator!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in a quiet library when I noticed a buzzing sound. I ignored it, but it kept going. I looked around, but nobody else seemed to notice. After 5 minutes of searching, I realized the buzzing was coming from my backpack. My electric toothbrush had turned itself on and was rattling around. Everyone watched me pull out a vibrating bag. FML
Today, I kept hearing a weird buzzing sound in my apartment. I turned off everything, unplugged appliances, and was on the verge of calling maintenance. Turns out, it was my electric toothbrush vibrating in my suitcase… for three hours. FML
Today, my stomach growled so loud in class that a boy sitting next to me thought his phone had vibrated. FML
Today, I sat through a dentist's appointment convinced my phone was on silent. It was not. My (loud) ringtone went off at the worst possible moment, the dentist was rattled like it was a jump-scare in a movie, and had to stop and wait while I apologised with half my face numbed and stretched open. FML
Today, I was chewing my pen while I was paying attention to my teacher. I chewed a bit too hard, and something broke off, so I casually looked at my pen. It was unharmed. One of my front teeth had broken off. Everyone in class, including the teacher, had to see it before I could call my dentist. FML
Today, in class, I reached into my bag to pull out a tampon, which I hid under my sleeve so I could make a quick escape to the restroom. My teacher yelled at me, because she thought I'd taken out my phone. I then had to prove myself by showing the tampon to the whole class. FML
Today, I needed money to go to the movie. I asked my mom if I could reach in her purse and grab a few bucks. When I opened up her purse her phone started to vibrate. I yelled over to my mom that her phone was ringing. She said the phone was next to her. I looked in the purse. It was a vibrator. FML
Today, I was giving a lecture to my class I heard a phone go off. Aggravated and exhausted, I asked everyone to turn their phones off. Then the phone rang again. I lost my shit and spent the next half hour calling my students a bunch of "technology whores". Then I realized the phone was mine. FML
Today, I was at the store with my mother in the facial care section. I found this device that scrubs your face with those anti-bacterial pads. The aisle was crowded and noisy, so I shouted to my mother, "Can I have this vibrator thing?" It went silent. FML
Today, I was talking to my mother when we both heard a continuous buzzing noise. Unable to locate the source of the noise we gave up. About an hour later, my mother yells down the stairs to me. Turns out my dog stole my vibrator, chewed it and presented it to my mother. FML
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Top comments
donkeybutts 0
you could have just showed them the toothbrush...not really fml
djse 8
I can almost hear this going down. No, you guys! It's my toothbrush! I have a dentist appointment...YOU GUYS ARE JERKS! *cry* #2 - All pulling out the toothbrush (no pun intended) woulda done is help start the rumor that Jess masturbates with her toothbrush between classes. Kids are assholes.
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Comments (68)
Tehalon 0
Did you offer em live shows?
donkeybutts 0
you could have just showed them the toothbrush...not really fml
zoe768532 1
Totally agree
kk_fml 0
I hate FMLs like this. Is it really that hard to give a simple explanation? All you had to say was "no its my toothbrush" then pull it out to prove it and its not an FML. Also why would they think it was a vibrator and not a phone? way more likely
DimebagDavid 0
I hate fake FML's too
stephanieeDawnx 0
Because phones don't vibrate constantly? Even if it's ringing, every phone I've ever had only rang for a few seconds, stopped, then vibrated again. Whereas, a vibrator vibrates nonstop, unless you make it stop. But I agree, they could've explained, & pulled it out to prove.
SebastianG 2
Because phones don't continuously vibrate.
djse 8
I can almost hear this going down. No, you guys! It's my toothbrush! I have a dentist appointment...YOU GUYS ARE JERKS! *cry* #2 - All pulling out the toothbrush (no pun intended) woulda done is help start the rumor that Jess masturbates with her toothbrush between classes. Kids are assholes.
mattmag 0
So? If it was your phone, your class would probably yell the same thing. I'm sure they didn't actually think it was a vibrator, but wanted to poke fun at you instead. How do these get past moderation? When I moderate, there are tons of great ones that never get on the site.
yabrett 0
#3, probably cause phone's vibrate, pause, vibrate, pause etc... electric toothbrush's (like vibrators) don't stop vibrating, but ya i agree this isn't really an FML, and stupid ones like this shouldn't get approved
dammn 0
i agree with # 2
audereyy 0
aw that sucks....
friedkabob1225 0
The girl in the corner who really does have a vibrator is silently defending you
tehhotness 0
shoulda put on a show, you would have gone from being made fun of to being the most popular girl in school