Today, my husband came home with tears in his eyes. I ran and asked him why he was crying. He said he wasn't, but he finally admitting to talking to a woman in a bar who, when she noticed his wedding ring, sprayed him with mace. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband came home drunk off his ass at 2am. He started crying on my shoulder because he couldn't go home with some beautiful woman who hit on him, because sadly for him, he's married to me. FML
Today, I confronted my husband about yet again going out “with the boys” and not coming home. I told him that as long as he has that ring on his finger, he’s gonna respect me, the kids, and our home. He responded by taking off his wedding band and throwing it to the ground. FML
Today, my husband of one week lost his wedding ring while we were preparing for a dinner party. After a thorough search and no luck, I started to cry. He told me to quit being a drama queen because we had guests. He then got drunk with his friends, puked on the patio, and called me a bitch. FML
Today, my husband ran at me, groaning like a zombie. I was so startled that I screamed, punched him, and started sobbing. Now he won't talk to me because this is 'the first step on the road of domestic violence'. FML
Today, my husband went on a boys' night but I found his wedding ring on the nightstand so I confronted him when he got home. He was wearing his ring. What I had was a brass olive ring for plumbing so now I look like a jealous idiot. FML
Today, I married the love of my life. I was ecstatic until the wedding reception, where my new husband got drunk and started crying about how he'd been "forced" into marrying me. FML
Today, I realised I may need to work on my marriage when I saw my husband in public, laughing and smiling with his coworkers, then when he saw me his smile disappeared and he stood up like a tired old man to come and speak to me. FML
Today, my husband came home from work in a bad mood. Why? He found out that a certain female coworker of his isn't single anymore. FML
Today, there was a knock at my door, and I was greeted by a punch to the face. The man was the extremely angry "fiancé" of the girl I've been married to for just over a year. FML
Today, I went all out for my husband on our anniversary. I planned meals, took him to a stage show, and got him a bottle of cologne he loves. He was moody, distant, and at one point crying. Why? He found out his ex-wife is getting married today and he couldn’t stop thinking about her. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
MidnaLink 35
Hang on. He said he was only talking to her, he doesn’t say flirting, but she sprays him with mace just because of the ring? I believe that could be filed under assault.
MidnaLink 35
Well, of course he couldn’t, so I’m only hoping someone at the bar called the cops for him.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (11)
MidnaLink 35
Hang on. He said he was only talking to her, he doesn’t say flirting, but she sprays him with mace just because of the ring? I believe that could be filed under assault.
MidnaLink 35
Well, of course he couldn’t, so I’m only hoping someone at the bar called the cops for him.
alycion 39
It’s not uncommon for people to wear their rings after a souse passes, so that was a total overreaction. I wonder if he was just being friendly, flirting to see if he still had it for an ego boost, or trying to get somewhere. The first two are a fhl as well. And come on, if you can’t admit that even if you are in a relationship with your soul mate, someone else finding you desirable isn’t an ego boost, you are lying to take the high road or someone who would overreact and mace someone.
evilplatypus 39
It would get filed under battery. I’m wondering how honest hubby is being though. The ones that would mace a guy just for talking to them are few and far between. At minimum, I’m betting he said some creeper level stuff that made her fear for her safety and he’s just covering his ass.
Meghan Mayhugh 5
It may be a bit overkill but who knows what the relationship was prior to this incident. If he’s crying because some chick saw his wedding ring what else is he doing?
itisme_fml 9
Umm... he wasn't "crying" for some girl seeing his ring, but because he was mace-sprayed! Having hot pepper sprayed on your eyes can cause tears, and are painful!
WeirdUS 30
I doubt he was only talking something must have been said thaat was unwanted and likely of or of a sexual nature.
leximichelle 13
Depends on the interaction they had when she sprayed him. If he was flirting with her, he deserved it. If she just assumed he was being a creeper or something during a normal conversation or he had just approached her when she sprayed him, then she’s probably crazy. Or conceited.
ViviMage 40
Whatever happened to throwing your drink at someone or slapping their face? Or both?