Today, I got very dressed up and was excited for my uncle's wedding. While standing in line for photos, I heard my dad's voice from behind me say "Who's the hot chick in the brown dress?" My uncle responds "Uh, that's your daughter." Silence. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got married. My dad wanted to see me before the ceremony in my dress. The dress I wore was not my usual kind of dress, strapless. The first thing my dad said, "Ginger! You've got boobs!" Not exactly the father-daughter moment I'd envisioned. FML
Today, I was the best man at a wedding and I was flirting with a cute bridesmaid. Then this old guy decides to give the newlyweds a toast. He made a crappy joke and barely anybody laughed. So I say to the girl, "Wow that sucked, who the hell does he think he is?" The girl replies, "That's my dad". FML
Today, my uncle was supposed to be the officiant at my wedding but he and my dad teamed up to make a joke about how this was actually my fiancé's funeral. Everyone laughed, except my fiancé. He burst into tears and ran from the altar. We can’t find him and he’s not answering his phone. FML
Today, my father got married. He left me a voicemail to tell me all about it. FML
Today, I discovered that my father is getting married. Overjoyed and confused because I didn't know he was dating, I called him up to congratulate him, and ask who she was. Apparently, his soon to be fiancée is my mother-in-law. My wife is not happy. FML
Today, at our wedding reception my new father-in-law gave his speech, saying his little girl was too good for me. Everyone, including my parents, agreed. FML
Today, I was at lunch with my grandpa and my sister. My grandpa looks over at my sister and says, "Wow. You're so beautiful." Right after, he turns to me and says, "And you have a nice coat." FML
Today, I realized why my 50 year old Dad's 30 something girlfriend looked so familiar. She is in all my parents wedding photos... as the flower girl. FML
Today, my dad, who lives hours away, called and told me he was getting married. Today. As in this evening. Guess I'm not invited. FML
Today, I came home at noon from a long night out. I was surprised to see a woman I didn't recognize standing in my living room in a brown dress and heels. As I walked up to the door and knocked to be let in, the woman whipped around and I figured out who it was. My dad. FML
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Top comments
teqifsha 0
I think you're allowed to do that.
lives_ppl 0
I'm sorry but that is too funny
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Comments (212)
SimonJaxx11 0
ha ur dad is a dirty fuckng perv
prettykitty123 0
I'm sorry this has to be said. Can you not speak english? "Very dressed up" you can't be very dressed up, your eather dressed up or not. I'm not the grammer police but that sentence isn't even close to be right.
mobius8 0
"Very dressed up" is better English than "eather", "grammer" and "isn't even close to be right".
mobius8 0
and "your" and "english". Are you just trolling?
kcslgvr 11
Are you serious? "Very dressed up" makes a whole lot more sense than "eather", "grammer", "english", "your"(which should be "you're") or "be" (which should be "being"). So don't try to tell people that they have poor "grammer" when you can't even spell you loser.
jaybrown 0
I usually never say this, but W I N everybody who just commented on 62!!! I was about to say the same thing.
ridgie 0
FAIL #62. Learn to spell before you start insulting people for their grammar. Oh the irony.
ZombieSazza 34
You make it too easy for us grammar Nazi's, #62.
prettykitty123 0
I didn't say I was grammer police did I? Nope. But very is still wrong.
mobius8 0
Your grammar is worse than hers though, and your spelling is terrible. And "very dressed up" isn't even really grammatically incorrect, just by the way.
midwestjerk 0
It's "grammar", dumbass. /facepalm
TheNewGuy03 29
you should discontinue speech, time now. |the kid|
xbox720 0
but very is wrong?how can you talk about other peoples grammar when yours is sucky
warrenthewalrus 0
Lmfao! 63 got owned! :D
Maso_fml 0
i don't see how.
irrelevantxx 0
Hahahhahaha, oh my....
iSmellNice 2
At least you're hot...
blehh1431 0
a complement is a complement :)
midwestjerk 0
That is ******* hilarious! Though, I have to admit I was surprised that I didn't see "West Virginia" for the OP's location.
SKYblue_fml 1
Says "midwestjerk" stereotypes are really irritating. Do people ask you if you're all slow farmers?
midwestjerk 0
Thankfully I'm not in one of the worthless Bible-thumping corn-******* states like Iowa or Nebraska. As for my stereotype comment - my screen name is "midwestJERK". I'm mostly on here to make outrageous comments and piss people off. You can dismiss about 90% of what I say as things that are said to intentionally aggravate people.
Heathersaur 0
I agree with the many previous comments that your Dad would be far more embarassed than you. But still, that is extremly awkward, and kinda gross. How could he not notice you from the dress you were wearing?
myantosu 0
At least he didn't say " Who's the dog in the brown dress?"