Today, I got pulled over on the highway for going over the speed limit. The cop seemed nice, and I was sure he'd let me off with a warning, until my husband piped up with, "Didn't think you folks came out this far. What, the donut store got shut down or some shit?" I got the ticket. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was pulled over and was given a $300 ticket for going 90mph on a 70mph highway. The cop swore he saw my silver car darting in and out of traffic. A couple of minutes earlier that exact car had passed me while I was following the speed limit. FML
Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I tried to make a joke to ease the tension and said, "I’m just trying to keep up with the traffic!" The officer looked around at the empty road and said, "What traffic? Are you under the influence? HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" It went downhill from there. FML
Today, I got pulled over and ticketed while taking cookies to the local police station. FML
Today, a cop rear-ended me. Then I received a ticket from him for driving too far under the speed limit. We were in a school zone. FML
Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML
Today, after giving my husband a ton of crap about the speeding ticket he got last year, I got a speeding ticket. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding and got a $200 ticket. After I pulled away, I decided to warn the next car about the cop up ahead by flashing my headlights. The next car was another cop. He didn't appreciate my "help". FML
Today, while driving home, I saw a cop with a speed gun "hidden" by the side of the road. I went to slow down so the fuck-knob wouldn't be able to ticket me. I then had a brain-fart and floored the gas instead of hitting the brakes. Hello speeding ticket. FML
Today, I was smoking while driving. A cop pulled me over and asked if I knew what I did wrong. I thought he could smell the tobacco, so I decided to just admit it. As it turns out, I was going well over the speed limit. FML
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Top comments
BreadstickFTW 7
Next time tell him to shutup before all the stupid comes out.
Palirose 22
I'm sorry, OP. Maybe next time try not to speed or go over the limit. Just pay your ticket before it gets higher.
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Comments (95)
moonzombie 13
But yeah, mouthing off to cops is generally a bad idea. Sorry, OP, your husband's kind of a dumbass.
jelrid 30
Sounds like your husband will be paying the ticket.
cIouds 15
I swear I saw a similar FML to this...
stellasue11 38
Gotta hand it to him, it was funny enough to get a fml published lol