Today, I got on an elevator at the mall, along with a twelve or thirteen-year-old girl talking on her cell. She spent the whole ride telling the person on the other end how hideous I looked and how I look like a pregnant sperm whale. I was too humiliated to even say anything. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went to the mall. A little girl was walking around and telling everyone that they were pretty. When she got to me, she gave me a disgusted look and walked away. FML
Today, I was the only one in an elevator when an attractive girl came in, talking on her phone. She told her friend, "I have to go, there's a cute guy on this elevator." Before I could even react, she turned to me and said, "Sorry for lying, I really wanted to get off the phone with her." FML
Today, I got on an elevator with a woman and her child. I was the first one on. When she stepped on, the capacity alarm went off. As she left she told her daughter that's why fat people shouldn't be allowed in public. I'm 145 lbs. She was twice my size. I got called fat by a hippopotamus. FML
Today, while in the elevator with the girl from my office that I've been crushing on, but never spoken to, I said "aren't elevators awkward?" After a long silence, she got off three floors before our office. FML
Going down
Today, I tried to strike up a conversation with someone in an elevator by commenting on the "beautiful view." We were in a windowless elevator, heading for the basement parking lot. I then had to try and appear less psychotic to avoid freaking them out even more. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML
Sometimes, it's better to say nothing
Today, I got into an elevator with a stranger. The silence was so awkward that I muttered, “Sometimes I pretend I’m on a reality show.” The stranger just stared at me until the doors opened. We work on the same floor. FML
Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML
Today, I was on the elevator going up to a meeting, and the elevator was getting more and more crowded as we went up. After about ten people got on, they all agreed that I should get off the elevator because they thought me being on was exceeding the weight limit. FML
Body issues
Today, I was in an elevator with a coworker I barely know. My stomach thought that it was time to remind me I hadn’t eaten breakfast. It growled like a dying whale, and my coworker gave me a concerned look. To make it worse, the elevator got stuck for five minutes. We stood in awkward silence, with my stomach making noises the whole time. FML
Top comments
makaramiracles 18
D'aww. 99.3% of my generation sucks, sorry OP.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Should've told her to go **** herself. And then you should've shoved the phone up her ass. :P Yeah she's young, I guess, but that doesn't give her the right to treat you like shit. If they don't get taught a lesson, they won't learn.
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Comments (315)
fatalwish 6
eh its a kid trying to act cool. if its any consolation i forsee that same kid growing up to realize she has no real friends and every man who has ever dated her only did it for her looks. oh and around 40 those guys will probably stop dateing her because shes a shallow twat who never learned to converse with other people, or ever look past tbe first layer of anything so yes a hollow existance i forsee in her future .
brittneymr 2
Stand up and say something. If we as a society do not put these kids in their place (since obviously this child's parents have NOT raised her), were doomed when they become adults. You deserved being embarrassed if you can't stand up to a teenager.
Crazberry 5
So do people ;P
laundryninja 1
I'm all for mass genocide of assholes. just throwin that idea out there ya know.
vr4_211 2
it's sad that kids nowadays don't have manners...
sleet7 4
That pisses me off that you took shit from a disgusting excuse for a child.
jarockstar27 10
I would have been like "you know this sperm whale also has ears right?" and then i would have insulted her on her looks too but i guess im petty like that lol
NewKonoiche 6
Wow, what a little bitch! That's pretty shocking that she said it right in front of you. Usually tween girls are more subtle than that.
NewKonoiche 6
Forgot to add: she probably should have just texted her feelings to her friend, rather than saying them out loud.
Fishfanatic 7
I would have high kicked the phone clean out of her hand .
stormchaser319 7
This is why I hate this generation. they're rude and selfish and disrespectful. Sorry you had to endure that