oops
Cheltenham, Australia
Today, I got confused and said grace before brushing my teeth. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Zimbabwe
Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML
Noname
France
Today, whilst brushing my teeth, I fell asleep, poking myself in the eye with my toothbrush. FML
captfml
United States
Today, I was in the bathroom in a rush to get ready. Without thinking, I put hand soap on my toothbrush. I didn't notice until it was already in my mouth. FML
jj.
United States
Best teeth in the game
Today, as always, my mom loudly asked me if I'd brushed my teeth, then replied to my yes with, “I don’t believe you.” All because I forgot to brush my teeth once when I was 5. I’m 17 now. FML
Simon Cowell
Today, I realised my teeth are so stained that they look cleaner when I've not brushed them. FML
knighton16
United States
Today, I was brushing my teeth and shaving in the shower. My favorite song came on, and I got mixed up. My tongue and mouth are cut badly now. FML
Anonymous
Ouch
Today, while brushing my teeth half asleep, I stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush, toothpaste included. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
Eww! Cleanliness!
Today, I got looked at weirdly for brushing my teeth in an airport bathroom. FML
Sergie
Ireland
Minty freshness
Today, I was getting ready for my first day at work. Right before leaving the house I brushed my teeth thoroughly one more time to have a fresh breath. While cleaning my tongue, I went too far, which made me throw up. I was 20 minutes late for work. Good start. FML
fax4voice3
Brooklyn, United States
Snap!
Today, I was flossing my teeth, which I do only to not get yelled at (chewed out?) by my dentist. Dentist I’ll now be seeing later today because the floss broke off a corner of one of my molars. FML
Top comments
twitchywaffles 26
Jesus will make sure you never have a cavity again
Welshite 40
Dear God, Accept this sacrifice of oral agony as I dedicate my teeth to Your great glory. Please keep my pearly whites safe so that I might one day see Heaven's Pearly Gates. Amen.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (71)
Enslaved 38
God knows where your mouth has been.
rozalyn77 15
Yeah, your life is so ******....
Symantha23 25
Haha how early was it??
TeasinDaNoobs 16
Drunk college stories, featuring OP
rainbowsRlove 15
dear God thank you for the food I did eat...
FalloutScrolls 25
The power of Crest compels you! The power of Crest compels you!!
EarlFug 19
Our Flosser, who art in heaven, Oral-B thy name. Thy Colgate come, plaque will become, inert and cavities forbidden. Give us this day our daily breath, and forgive us our cuspids as we forgive popcorn which trespass against us. And lead us not into orthodontism, and deliver us from dentists. For Listerine is the glory, forever and ever, amen.
FalloutScrolls 25
You just... the Lord's Prayer... dental version... You're my hero.
thatonlinedude 5
beautiful, just beautiful
whysobeachy 37
This is beautiful. I kind of want to memorise it, so I can repeat it in my mind and have a quiet laugh whenever "Our Father" is said, in my presence.
False_Stupidity 42
That was so amazing. I'm going to keep that if you don't mind.
cornyrob 33
That's even better than the Our Lager beer prayer
worldclassrager 41
Bless your mouth as well...not a sin...
ShyVi 18
Once in 4th grade, that's what I did when I was supposed to be reciting the pledge of allegience. Thankfully I caught myself before anyone else noticed, being a quiet person helps sometimes.
MonstreBelle 29
"Since this is Aunt Bethany's 80th Christmas, I think she should lead us in the saying of grace." "What, dear?" "Grace!" "Grace? She passed away thirty years ago." "They want you to say grace." "The blessing!" "I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic for which it stands. One nation, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all." "Amen."
doodlecloud 27
Easy to forget where you are in the day. A few times now I've gone to the toilet, washed my hands and then ended up cleaning my teeth because I was in front of the sink and it just kinda happened. Maybe you were hungry and thinking about food?
cornyrob 33
Yeah OP must've been hungry at the time