Today, I got a separation agreement from my wife. It was sent from the lawyer she spent the long weekend with right before she told me it was over. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I signed the divorce papers my wife gave me. When I went to bed, she was on the phone talking to her new boyfriend. FML
Today, I got a gift from my wife in the form of divorce papers. She waited till after New Year's so it wouldn't show up on her taxes for 2011. FML
Today, after I filed for divorce, the papers were received by my soon-to-be ex-husband on our wedding anniversary. FML
Today, my wife said she wants a divorce. Three days ago, I added her onto the title to my house, my bank accounts, and my business. FML
Today, my wife told me that she wants a divorce. Apparently, I'm taking too long to forgive her for having an affair. FML
Today, my wife put divorce papers in my birthday card. FML
Today, my current wife left me for my ex-wife. FML
Today, I got a letter from the state that I'm being divorced. I've never been married. FML
Today, I found out I was getting a divorce. My wife is leaving me for my brother, saying that now that he has money there is nothing that can stand in their way. I recently decided to send him money to help him get back on his feet. FML
Today, my my soon to be ex-wife found out I was telling the truth and never cheated. She wanted to get back together but I told her that we're too far into the divorce proceedings to turn back, and there's just no fixing our marriage. She then told me she's filing for full custody with no visitation rights. FML
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Top comments
Intoxicunt 6
You were dumped for a LAWYER? Yep, FYL.
AliaChen 5
she's a bitch, forget her
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Comments (161)
ipodobsessed 0
suck to be you
the_flirtt 0
ya that sucks bro
ipodobsessed 0
sorry man i posted this befor i read it, FYL
sarah48_fml 0
girls are bitches.. sorry man :-/
wuzgudhomzz 0
ouch xD
illmatic2 16
There seems to be way too many eminem fans on this site...
RTRbryant 0
it could be worse op could be pregnant
ipodobsessed 0
Hes hott!!! <3 (im a girl btw)
2kool4skoolyo 0
I see that your wife loves the lawyer... typical
Tasanasanta 0
Everytime I read these kind of FML's I just wonder what got them married in the first place. OP- Spend a long weekend with her sister now.
illmatic2 16
I always thought he looked like a really skinny drug addict. oh wait... Just kidding. Just kidding.
mfmylifesrsly 30
eminem beats women!
illmatic2 16
No he doesn't, he just jokes about it.
mfmylifesrsly 30
I know I was kidding. I love him and Lil Wayne and Usher and T.I. and Trey Songz, but my favorite is Drake <3
Mehness 0
I just love how most girls' favorite singers/bands are only their favorites because they are/have a "hot" guy :)
illmatic2 16
Lol you and I have a completely different taste in music.
cole86 0
haha
mfmylifesrsly 30
25 - the "they are/have" a confuses me a bit...are you saying girls like singers either because they're hot or because the girl has a hot bf? o.O
BoyFromTheFuture 0
he's saying that girls like the boy then the band then the music in that order... idk but I will say that there is a lot of terrible shit on my wife's iPod.
StoryOfTheYear 15
Indeed, very suckalicious
mfmylifesrsly 30
haha actually for me if went opposite. but my boyfriend thinks my music sucks as well haha
heyred 11
Ethics violation! Report him to his bar!
MrFerret 0
Look on the bright side, he is a lawyer so he's probably a Jew. Just slap a swastica on an easy bake oven and leave it on his door step. The perfect revenge >:)
Mumbellosity711 0
62 your picture is freakin awesome lmao
BoyFromTheFuture 0
84 there is only one Tom green and it's not you.
StoryOfTheYear 15
I bet if I looked thru a phonebook I'd find more than one Tom Green
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
84: You disgrace our species. We are not amused. -.-
kyarush 10
adultery. you automatically win in court
blakehilli8 0
I agree
strikeeagle 3
rap and hip hop sucks, Cannibal Corpse RULEZ!
the_flirtt 0
wow 123
FFML_314 12
Wow what? Also, why do you use a fake picture? Put yourself up!
cruxx 0
i see putting up pictures of your dog is outdated. time for a picture of me? ;o
AliaChen 5
she's a bitch, forget her
ugwmii 0
yea
underaegis 0
forget? Screw that get a hot Lawer of your own
residentZERO 0
Marriage isn't sacred anymore, just a way to save a few bucks a year come tax time. :/
Intoxicunt 6
You were dumped for a LAWYER? Yep, FYL.
Intoxicunt 6
She's getting a job at the firm come Monday. The Mrs. will stay with the cheating attorney. Moonlighting aside, she really needs his money.
WhyTheFace4 0
Nice.
ifyouseekamy666 0
what a wonderful charicature of intimacy!! :D loove that song! <3
meowmix01 0
Panic! At The Disco :)
CaptainLo 0
Good point ****. She will be working for him and eventually he is going to spend long amounts of time with a new woman thus creating new content for "48 Hours on ID."
RTRbryant 0
i love how he said that so casually mm good point ****
MykeLytorus 0
Hey ****, I see you had 2 FMLs confirmed. Which ones were they? Do you have the guts to share?
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Toxi, I <3 the new pic! :]
FFML_314 12
"Do you have the guts to share" Everyone knows what they are, because her name would read underneath the FML. Happy hunting.
Intoxicunt 6
Thanks TIJD! And yay for all the P!atD fans. And um, I don't remember them. You can do a search. I know one was a few months ago. I fell into a hottub swan-style. The other, I don't remember. It was more recent though.
samantha_durano 6
@85, haha i know!
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Toxi, you threw away a plate of food you'd just made. *melts back into the wall, watching. always watching.*
sammehsaurus 0
I thought I saw Toxi's name on an FML involving squirrels o.O ..or maybe I'm just crazy. Haha:/
sourgirl101 29
No, I believe it was about shoes on a boat and throwing away food. Sorry I'm not a stalker. I swear!
FFML_314 12
She posted one FML about face planting into a hot tub. The other one, was about taking a good amount of time preparing a meal and instead of throwing the napkin away, she threw her plate of food away. Those were the 2.
Intoxicunt 6
Um, you're all right. I have more than two. Squirrel came down my chimney, I dropped a plate of food, faceplanted in a hot tub, and left my shoes on the bank when tubing. IDK why FML has sooooo many ******* bugs, but this is one of them. It doesn't show the real number. :/
FFML_314 12
A squirrel came down your chimney? I would have died.
sourgirl101 29
My number is sadly real. I thought it would be funny to summit 69 stories just ' because I like the number.(:
mshooter 0
sourgirl you are a good wife.
MykeLytorus 0
You can put any name under an FML, but if se put it as her name then I guess she does have the guts. A lot of people do them anonymously or use a false name.
rawrawsum 0
that's horrible :(
hcovballer247 0
Oooohhhh that sucks : (
DessMusik 0
wow!
RedPillSucks 33
You are going to be so separated from your money. You might want to hire a lawyer to see what your options are. In NC, the cheated-on spouse can sue for damages under "Alienation of affection". Not sure what country/state you're in, YMMV.
DaveP 0
he's from France (look on the posters profile)
Intoxicunt 6
What "poster's profile" are you talking about? All it says is that it was sent from a mobile version. In other words, the website can't pinpoint where he's at because he's using a phone instead of a computer. No idea where you get France from that.
Freeze_fml 17
Sometimes, like right now, the app will assume if it has been sent from a mobile version, that the location is "Île-de-France - France." It's very annoying.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Aah, new internet slang for my FML vocab. Thanks RPS.
Jester7 0
that's tough man, I'm sorry...my sister and brother-in-law are goin through a divorce right now, it sucks and I wish you the best of luck
smileygirl1234 0
aw thats so sweet of you to say! :)
smileygirl1234 0
oh and im sorry for you sister and brother-in-law getting divorced.
awesomesauce8 0
I pity you. your wife chose a lawyer over you...something is wrong here...but I'm still laughing hysterically
hannah6 0
if thats true, thats a pretty major ethics violation...
MissChelle79 0
Right!! Sorry OP... that really sux :-(
Epilepsy_fml 0
I like to make the love.