Today, I got a new babysitting job. Every time the little girl goes to the bathroom, she screams and cries until I wipe her. She's 7 years old. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realized that my 3 year-old son, who is being potty trained, has better aim standing up to pee than his 30 year-old father. FML
Today, my mother stopped speaking to me because I won’t let her babysit anymore. Her idea of babysitting is to sit my daughter alone with a tablet and a pile of sugary junk food for 7 hours straight. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job Mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML
Today, I've been babysitting a 4 month-old for two days. This has made a great impression on my cat, because now I can't sit down without him jumping up and licking my face until I pat his butt and rock him like the baby. FML
Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML
Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML
Today, I was with my 3 year-old son in the doctor's office. During the exam, he informed the doctor that he doesn't sleep in mommy's bed anymore because mommy sleeps in her underwear and farts all night long. FML
Today, my sister told me not to come over anymore because her baby is scared of my face. FML
Today, the couple with three noisy toddlers in the apartment above mine finally moved out. A couple with a non-stop crying newborn moved in. FML
Today, I saw a woman breastfeeding her child at the local park. That would have been just fine if the child wasn't at least 8 years-old. FML
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Top comments
turtle_darkness 17
Her parents have obviously done a shitty job..
burnthistown 20
That's pretty inappropriate for that age. I would have called the parents and asked what was going on.
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Comments (104)
deltax 8
Ask for a raise
Witchylady 18
Well I guess she must spend her whole day at school in dirty underwear if she can't even wipe her own ass
scottishoatmeal 22
That girl needs some serious guidance in her life
arisanator9900 20
sounds good to me (͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
DJDualScreen 4
the f*** dude? I sincerely hope that's just some sick and twisted joke.
AmbrosiaFan 19
Did you talk to the parents before about her and potty training? And did they tell you about her needing someone to wipe? Is she special needs, or taking her time learning what to do?
biochem19 5
I can do you one better. I watch a little boy who does the same except he's 12.
Killnot123 6
People are stupid ¯_(ツ)_/¯