Today, I got a call from the girl I'd really like to date to meet up for drinks. Excited, I walked out my front door, slipped on a patch of ice, and dislocated my shoulder. She won't go out on a date with me now because I "ditched her". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend decided to break the news that she wanted us to be "just friends." However, she did it not in just any old way - while ice-skating. I'm currently in hospital getting stitches in my arm after I tripped in shock and she ran me over. FML
Today, I got stood up on a date. To add insult to injury, meeting up was her idea. FML
Today, while ice-skating with my girlfriend, I tried to do what they do in the movies and make her gently fall into my arms. Instead she slipped, fell, and hit her head on the ice. FML
Today, after the girl I fell head over heels for asked me out last night, it turns out she was so drunk at the time, she doesn't remember and doesn't want to date me at all. I'm beginning to feel like my life is some shitty movie. FML
Today, I was stood up on a date. Her excuse? "I had to work out." FML
Today, I was on a date with this girl. I attempted to put my arm around her, but I elbowed her in the face instead. FML
Today, I went out on a date with a girl for the first time. I opened her car door for her and then slammed her leg in it upon closing. She will be in a cast for 6 weeks. FML
Today, it snowed. So, a guy I like and I decided to go sledding. I really wanted to impress him by going down the hill and casually slowing down at the bottom right at his feet. Instead, I crashed into him and broke his ankle. FML
Today, I finally went on a date with the girl I'm in love with. After dinner we went to the bar for drinks and things were going great. Right up until she went home with another guy. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me and while trying to make a dramatic exit, I slammed his car door, slipped on the ice and landed on my back in front of a large crowd of onlookers. FML
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Top comments
Pinkolulooo 0
You should explain to her what happened.
tisiphone_fml 0
Couldn't you give her a call on your way to the doctor's? Even at this point, can't you just explain what happened? If she won't believe you when your arm's in a brace, she's probably not the kind of person you want to date.
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Comments (45)
perdix 31
You did ditch her. You should have dragged your pansy-ass to the bar and asked her to come to the hospital with you. Try to handle the pain of the doctor's examination of your shoulder with some manly fortitude, and try not to piss your pants at the sight of a needle. That's how a guy who wanted to get laid would have handled it.
Blotto_fml 0
I slipped on a rock at the bottom of a waterfall, I was 1.5kms away from the road, I popped it back in my rotating my arm and stretching it forward. It hurt yeah, but I still walked back to the road. You prob should have just done that and went to meet her.
Guppy7600 0
lol blowerr
disney_blonde 16
You could've at least called her on the way to/at the hospital.
sourgirl101 29
Your 1st date should have been at the hospital.
Erindub 0
Well you're better off not dating her any way. If shes this annoying now imagine what she'd be like a year from now. Sounds like one of those girls who'd look through your cell phone while you were taking a poop. You don't need this shit.
aardvarkish 17
tgis
kyster980kp 0
hahaha
Egiev 0
i guess dislocated shoulder doesnt work as an excuse anymore, thanks for letting me know
Squeezeit 0
Maybe you could have called her while in the hospital so she did't think you were making up an excuse.
AmbrosiaFan 19
FYL. Sounds like she isn't one worth keeping anyway if she doesn't even let you explain what happened.