Today, I got a call from my son's second grade teacher. He happens to write and throw with both hands, and wanted to share this during show and tell. Apparently, he didn't know the word for this is ambidextrous, because his teacher told me, "Your son just told the whole class that he's bisexual!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to my 7 year old son's school for a conference with his teacher. When I got there, the teacher said "she adored me for who and what I am". I was puzzled. Turns out my son told his class that I am a "lesbian American." Wrong. I'm Lebanese-American. FML
Today, my son decided to come out of the closet by wearing a shirt that said "Mom, I'm gay" to the family reunion. FML
Today, my daughter was telling everyone at her elementry school about my gay partner. Yes, I have a gay partner. He is my work partner and he happens to be gay. FML
Today, I found out why my 5 year-old son's teacher acts so awkward around me. My son told everyone in his class that I work as a stripper. I'm not a stripper, I work at the strip mall. FML
Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML
Today, I found out that my son has been telling me he's gay so we would allow the "female friend" who is actually his girlfriend to stay over. FML
Today, I got a note from my son's kindergarten teacher. During free time yesterday, he told her, "Mommy was stripping". I was indeed stripping. Paint that is. FML
Today, I got a call from my 8-year-old's 3rd grade teacher. Apparently a question went around class asking, "Why do you think you were put on this Earth?", and my son answered, "My dad says it's because I swam the fastest." FML
Today, my son's teacher asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up. He put down "unemployed". FML
Today, I got a text from my cousin saying that he's gay. I was thrilled and told him that I'm bisexual. He later texted me saying that his friend took his phone and said that. He also told all of our relatives. I accidentally came out to my family. FML
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Top comments
RandomFool 5
Ha, I'm sure they have no idea what that means. But hey, there isn't really anything wrong with being bisexual.
tukker 0
Haha, I am too, but I told everyone I was an air conditioner instead of ambidextrous when I was young
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Comments (220)
irishyankee868 5
hes just a little kid he doesnt know the friggin difference. the only thing im concerned about is the fact that the kid knew the word in the first place; i really hope you havent been calling him that for the kids sake. and this is not fml worthy at all its just a funny little story that you could tell you're significant other about and have a good laught. if you really think this is a fml then i suggest you seek psychiatric counseling.
madame_malfoy 4
this isn't an FML and whats wrong with him knowing that word? Knowing that at a young age just means he'll accept those of different orientation, half of you are going on asif it's akin to him saying "I'm a ************"...chill out besides...i sense stories for his future girlfriends LOL
HunterFalls13 0
I don't get it I get the bi sexual part But not how it relates to throwing a ball with both hands
Leoplum 0
ehh, I don't see why she would find it neccessary to call you. Well, other than the fact that it was hilarious.
texaswildflower 0
It's a pleasure to read a funny story, even on fmylife, which is supposed to be for misery to have company. Is there more to it? Was the teacher mean? Or were you just embarrassed, OP? Ain't kids grand?
monkeykiller77 0
Lets hope he didn mean that
musicmuse 0
oh that poor kid is gonna be teased for the rest of his school career. I'd really work on his vocabulary. But that must have been a really akward sitituation for his teacher.
Nikki_Loves_Him 0
Where did the kid learn Bisexual?
hiddaway25 0
I think this is a pointless "FML." Even if the kids in his class remembered that in high school, they would understand the difference between ambidextrous and bisexual. Its a simple misunderstand that isn't that difficult to explain.
playnejayne 0
why is this FML? Its funny.