Today, I found out where all my expensive bras and panties have been disappearing to. Apparently, while I'm at work, my fifteen year-old son's girlfriend has been stealing them after they have sex in my bed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out where all my missing panties have gone, when my 12-year-old daughter was caught selling them to the boys at school. FML
Today, I discovered that my 20-year-old son has been using my bras for his jerk-off sessions. FML
Today, I found my expensive lingerie I thought I had lost. In my 15-year-old brother's room. FML
Today, I found all my missing underwear that I have been looking for for months, and have been replacing. They were all hidden in a pile in my 14 year-old son's bedroom, covered in crusty stuff. When confronted, his response as to why was, "Hormones…?" FML
Today, while cleaning around the house, I found a black bra that wasn’t mine. I confronted my husband about it, which turned into a massive fight. It turned out that the bra actually belonged to my son’s girlfriend I didn’t know he had. FML
Today, my ten year-old brother told me that his thirteen year-old friend took one of my bras and two pairs of my underwear a few weeks ago. Apparently he took them out of my room, put them on, and has been sleeping with them ever since. He's coming to give them back tomorrow. FML
Today, and for weeks now, I was sure my underwear was going missing. I found out why. My husband's brother has been stealing them whenever he visits, presumably to masturbate with. I literally caught him shoving an unwashed pair into his pocket he'd stolen from my laundry pile. Creep. FML
Today, I found out that my daughter has been stuffing my push-up bras and lipstick into her backpack, putting them on at school, and taking them off before she gets home. She's 9. The only reason I found out is because her teacher reported me to social services. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that on his last visit, he snuck into the laundry and stole a lacy black thong he assumed was mine. It wasn't. It was my dad's. FML
Today, my son took some of my underwear to school. What's worse is he sold it to his classmate for $10. FML
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Top comments
danii_s2 0
and u found this out how?
SweetestSin 4
ok I am wondering how you found out as well? and what male wants to see their girlfriend in their moms underwear? That comes off as creepy to me (of course I am just assuming that she has stolen your things while he was present and that he has seen her in them)
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Comments (107)
bugmenotmofo 34
Kind of a back-handed compliment there!
perdix 31
How do you know it is only AFTER they have sex? My guess is that she dresses up as you and ***** your son on your bed in some kind of MILF fantasy. The MILF concept is only sexy if it applies to someone else's mom!
elparto 0
I think your son has finally reached the age where you're just going to have to slay him...
Newbie21 1
bad ass kids these days
Reality_bites 14
I vote you buy a whole heap of granny knickers and beige bras in a huge size. Then put them in the same spot as you used to put your expensive underwear with a note that reads "Let me know if you need a bigger size."
Bucinka 5
#28 beat me to it. An alternative would be to keep the nice undies in a lockbox with one of those five-letter combo locks (you can get them at Target or Wal-Mart) and, regardless of what you set the real combo to be, set the wheels to "*****." Leaving a note would be optional at that point.
lavaga 0
And make sure you sprinkle itching powder on the granny panties
maibiz 0
Um, yeah. Call her parents and tell them she's been stealing your undies (might wanna leave out the having sex part) I'd give her another chance, but if she pulls anything else dodgy/trashy make it clear to your son you'll want her kicked to the curb. Because she sounds like trailor trash as well as a ****.
Baytheshark 14
I would keep the having sex part in. They need to know that their daughter is not only a thief, but willing to spread her legs for the first guy that tells her he loves her.
fairies633 8
three words...slap a bitch
queenconeja 0
umm forget bout the underage sex thing, its wutever...im more concerned about this kid having sex in HIS MOMS BED..with a girl wearing HIS MOMS UNDERWEAR..u need to get him counseling cuz ur deffinetely on the right track to making him an older woman rapist tho. nice job..
COBRAMORPH 0
That is gross, for her. & I dont mean that to insult the OP, but they are used. Are they clean? I wont even touch my wife's undies taking them out of the dryer. I use another piece of clothing, & put then put that back in to be washed again. WTF???
T1A2Z3 35
You have a serious issue...
jluperrizzle 0
REALLY THOUGH! How did you find out???