Today, I found out that my stepsister loves sticking random household objects in her ear in an attempt to collect ear wax. I found out when I walked in on her trying to pick all the wax out of the bristles of my toothbrush. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Revenge is sweet
Today, I found out my sister scratches her butt with my toothbrush every time she is mad with me. FML
Today, I realized that the "eyelash curling brush" that my best friend found in my old bathroom drawer was actually a stick used for cleaning food out of my sister's braces. I used that thing for years. FML
Today, I found my sister licking all of the silverware and putting it back in the drawer. FML
Today, my four year old daughter came up to me with her finger in her ear. She then let me know that her earwax tasted better than the dinner I made. In front of my whole family. FML
Today, after a fight, I caught my sister rubbing my toothbrush on the inside of our grimy toilet. This is why I have trust issues. FML
Coming through
Today, I was cleaning wax out my ears when my wife came barrelling into the bathroom, desperate to pee. The door slammed right into the side of my head and the cotton swab I was using was pushed all the way in and ruptured my eardrum. FML
Today, I found out my sister has been "borrowing" my adult toys and putting them back without washing them well enough. How did I find out? I came back positive for an STI. FML
Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML
Today, my girlfriend was visiting, and while in the bathroom, she clogged the toilet. Since there was no plunger in the room, she unclogged it with the only thing she could find: my mother's hairbrush. FML
Today, while I was eating, my younger sister came over and sat beside me. She started clipping her toenails. Disgusted by it, I turned and opened my mouth to tell her to move somewhere else, just as one flew inside my mouth. FML
Top comments
Askavi 37
Her ear canal must be huge to fit a tooth brush in!
bella_nana347 23
Tell her to use a ******* q-tip. That is disgusting
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Comments (42)
samlovesham1234 9
Get her back by scrubbing the toilet with her toothbrush. Seriously that's disgusting.
Skycop_S 23
Hope to god that was the first time she used the brush
Baron_Kaz 15
How did she get it to fit in??
jellybean1996 7
Well, I think for her birthday, you should give her a package of Q-Tips... And your old toothbrush. Sorry, OP. Maybe keep your (hopefully new) toothbrush in your room? I don't think any of your possessions are safe from her ears!
donuts678 25
How old is she?
andrmac 25
I think you should start peeing on her personal items until you can call it a truce.
SheepShoop_fml 20
How dafuq she get a toothbrush in there?
hunnykhan 11
yuck!! the first word came out of my mouth! grosssss
LittleRich 10
That's some messed up Fetish she has going on.
sophie0908 16
Wow that's disgusting. Use her toothbrush to scrub the toilet and she'll get the idea