Today, a calf kicked a needle straight into my arm hard enough to make me stab myself. The good news is I'm now fully vaccinated for cow diseases. FML
ihatecoldfeet
Lavina, United States
ihatecoldfeet tells us more.
hey op here, wow the things city people don't understand! First off, each and every calf must be vaccinated or they could become Ill.Second I wasn't in front of the calf, the person holding the calf let go of it unexpectedly
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Top comments
ARetardedSeal 24
First it's the vaccine, then you'll have the urge to eat grass. Then the transformation begins
ChocolateScyther 19
Jenny McCarthy could use one of those shots.
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Comments (136)
organizse 28
Kids. They do the darnedest things.
rebelbelle 17
kid refers to a baby goat not a calf
organizse 28
oh lol
Dphill21 10
Lol, at least you tried
buttcramp 21
if this was about goats, it would have been an awesome first comment though lol
mattyiscool123 26
What?
ChocolateScyther 19
Jenny McCarthy could use one of those shots.
HeWillBeLoved105 22
Please tell me I'm not the only one who didn't really understand this..
TechnicallyWrong 12
A calf, which is a baby cow, was going to get shots to protect it from diseases. But the baby cow kicked the needle away from it making the owner accidentally stab them self with the needle. Hope I cleared things up a bit.
boating_guy 33
OP was trying to vaccinate the calf against cow diseases. The calf apparently wasn't having any part of being stabbed with the needle, and kicked in retaliation/out of fright. The needle consequently stabbed OP and OP got a full dose of cow vaccine
HeWillBeLoved105 22
Thanks guys. That did help a lot.
AmayaR 12
lol don't worry at first I didn't get it either but I reread it a few times and I understand it now
HeWillBeLoved105 22
I guess it was just the way OP worded it. Lol glad I wasn't the only one.
kibster9 20
@11 Actually you are technically wrong, (which goes with your name), there is no such thing as a "baby cow". It is called a calf. The overall species are not cows. A cow is a female that has had a baby. That is like saying every human is a woman. The overall species is called cattle.
Zebediabolical 45
Cow is a common use colloquial term for the bovines, generally excluding oxen and steers, And since language and definitions change as the common use does, (see 'literally' for a good recent example), they are technically correct.
kibster9 20
Actually, the terms bull, cow, and calf are used to describe the sex or age of the animals. The correct terms to use are cattle and bovine.
elyssa112 6
Really ? Who cares . A calf is a baby cow . If you look up the definition of calf it'll say that in all other words . So no he's not technically wrong . And no one asked to be corrected .. Thanks
False_Stupidity 42
A calf could also be a baby bull for all we know.
kibster9 20
@62 no one asked for your opinion, and no your statement is false. 78's statement is TRUE.
kerstileann 26
#42 tried to hard to sound smart.
kibster9 20
@90 I'm not trying to sound smart. I'm trying to teach everyone who says the wrong terminology. I have worked with cattle my whole life.
snoopy325 23
100, I've worked with cattle my whole life as well and while within our family we refer to them as heifers, steers, bulls, etc. we realize that most people see them as just "cows". There's nothing wrong with that and it's often difficult to explain the difference between the names anyway. It's silly to make people feel unnecessarily dumb (however fun it may be).
HeWillBeLoved105 22
It's funny 100 because you said no one asked for 62s opinion but nobody asked for yours.
kibster9 20
How am I being a dick? And it's the wrong terminology, but what ever floats your boat.
kibster9 20
My whole family also calls them by there sex or age. Which is bull, steer, heifer, cow, or calf. I am not trying to sound mean. I am just trying to teach the public who uses the wrong terminology. It is one of my pet peeves. If some one sees a group of them just call them cattle, or if you see just one call it one head of cattle. That is the most correct term to use.
kibster9 20
Also, cattle doesn’t have a singular form, aside from the technical term head of cattle. There isn’t a single word that means specifically a single cattle of unstated gender and age. As such, even though it’s technically inaccurate, cow is generally used in informal situations as the singular form of cattle. But even though a lot of people use cow as the term they are still wrong.
kibster9 20
Also, I have shown this thread to over five people and they all agree with me. Everyone that I have shown has grown up on a farm and is in college majoring in agriculture.
devinaww 15
man you are stubborn why don't you start using the genus and species name for it too? just to be, you know, technically accurate
kibster9 20
What, you want me to start using Bos Taurus instead of cattle or bovine? You can call me stubborn but I'm still right, and I have won the argument.
NakuEh 27
Dude... the general consensus is that no one cares. You lose. Drop it.
kibster9 20
If you didn't care you wouldn't have commented. I win.
Mazie_B 7
My friend and I, both horse geeks, partnered up to read a passage in 5th grade. We literally both started crying when they referred to a filly as a colt....
kibster9 20
See 131 gets what I'm writing about
devildog562 33
Why the hell did you have a needle around a calf ? It just doesn't seem like that would ever be a good idea.
ChocolateScyther 19
Because he's vaccinating the calf. what other reason could you possibly think of?
soulreaper12296 28
You're a special kind of stupid aren't you?
jazzy_123 20
well when I started reading the fml, I thought OP was talking about a sewing needle lol but I mean, the ending was clear enough to me
devildog562 33
If your vaccinating a calf then you should know not to stand behind it, but I did not finish reading the last line apparently. I too was thinking of a sewing needle.
fiveforfighting 26
I imagine he only stood behind it because that was the area he had to give the shot. Either way OP said the guy holding the calf let go so it's not like OP was carelessly standing behind it, knowing the power of the calf
kk21days 14
#39, OP probably was going to give the injection IM in the hind end. Cows can also kick out to their sides which is refered to as "cow kicking" so OP could have been kicked even if they weren't positioned directly behind the calf.
MrSarary 26
I have no idea what this FML is trying to say?
isisorchid 16
They should've said syringe instead of just needle. Needles make people thing of seeing. She was vaccinating calves when one kicked the syringe, and she got stuck.
AllSoul 23
But it's a needle, not a syringe?
christenswales 4
44, a needle and a syringe are the same thing.
bethers_ 22
No, they're actually not. The syringe is the plastic part with the pump that holds the substance being collected or dispensed. The needle is fitted into the syringe.
ARetardedSeal 24
First it's the vaccine, then you'll have the urge to eat grass. Then the transformation begins
kikoma 32
This. Priceless.
ChocolateScyther 19
Wait now I'm thinking of that SpongeBob episode where Squidward and SpongeBob get hit with a needle for Gary, and they become snails.
EarlFug 19
I just hope she doesn't have any udder problems!
CooperRage 13
And then you go crazy. Mad Cow style
Brandi_Faith 34
Seriously though op, you should probably see a doctor or even question a vet about that, to make sure you won't get sick from the needle/vaccine! I imagine you could have some nasty side effects from stuff like that. Especially if the calf weighed more than you.
karwank 13
Okay dr doofenscmirtz
thathobothere 17
It begins with simple things. One's hair goes black with grey patches, and develop a rubbery reproductive organ and a butt hair problem. Then they have to resist the urge to eat dirt for fear of getting called a hippie. At this point they are long gone. Soon they develop a white-and-black body hair problem, begin peeing out of their buttholes and develop what is disturbingly similar to a cow tail. Their nails become hard and black and long and wide (That's what she said, one might add) and they are shorter. The next day is when the transformation is finally complete. Source: Come here and I'll show you where I found out... And I'll show you my syringe collection!
Makifun 19
Im confused..
snowflaky 22
OP was trying to vaccinate a baby cow
kibster9 20
A calf, not a baby cow.
chefcow 17
Lol 60, a calf is a baby cow
CooperRage 13
Actually #72, if it was a male it would be a baby bull.
Tsula1994 13
Actual both a female and male baby cow are known to be called calves. Unless the male was castrated before puberty changing it to steer, calf is correct.
FitFriday 32
This is why you have a vet do it
Ashd09 30
Maybe op is a vet. Or they own a large cattle farm and can't call out a vet every time a calf needs vaccinations
Zebediabolical 45
Most dairy farmers I know, and I know several, do this themselves. It's prohibitively expensive to have a vet do it for you if you have enough cows to make a living.
tdawg91 17
I've never met a vet that has vaccinated a full herd, most farmers do it themselves
CooperRage 13
When I was still on the farm, I treated plenty of cattle. It's easy to learn. obviously OP didn't have the calf in a chute or tilt table which adds to the difficulty.
Chicagoillinois 18
Don't you need to push the syringe in to get everything?.. I can see the cow kicking it into you but not being completely injected
love_me_electric 20
Some livestock needles are like little guns, there's a trigger you pull and it quickly injects the needle and vaccine. Also, I think the FML was more to do with the fact that he was stabbed with a giant needle (since cow's have thick hides their vaccines have much bigger needles than ours)
angiemarie96 25
Those guns are huge time savers, but a pain to refill ._.
CooperRage 13
And you don't get a new needle for every animal like humans do, so there is likely more than just the vaccine or medicine on the needle.
burninsnow 23
At least you're protected.