Today, I found out I was 13th in a graduating class of about 350 students. When I told my mother, without batting an eye, she told me, "Hey, shit floats". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Nice try
Today, I recently graduated from high school and I went to a college party. I met these girls and told them I graduated college already, to sound cool. I then heard one of them say, "I went to middle school with you, and I was in your math class." FML
Today, I tripped in front of my graduation class of 225 and all of their relatives while receiving my diploma. FML
Keep it down!
Today, while at a grocery store, I told my mom I had some good news. She exclaimed, "You finally got a boyfriend?!" No mom, just an A on my math test. FML
Thanks Mom
Today, my school sent me an email saying I would be transferred to another class this Monday. I told my mom about it. Turns out my drunk mom ran into my teacher at a bar and started berating her for being at the bar, instead of grading her “kid’s exam already.” I’m a high school senior. FML
Today, while at school, a bra fell out of my coat. After the initial shock, people started congratulating me on finally getting a girlfriend. I didn't have the heart to tell them it was my mom's. FML
Average
Today, I found out that, despite my above average performance in school, I was right in the middle of my class ranking at graduation. My school stated that your respect for others would affect your ranking, but the fact that nearly all of the people who placed above me were gigantic pricks says otherwise. FML
Today, my mom called and told me I got accepted to my first-choice college. I got really excited and asked her to read me the letter. As she started to read it, she said, "Oops... uh, nevermind." FML
Lose-lose
Today, I found out that my mother has been seeing my maths teacher. I'm still failing his class. FML
Today, I found out my mom is the nude model for an art class at my college. FML
Today, I got a call from my 8-year-old's 3rd grade teacher. Apparently a question went around class asking, "Why do you think you were put on this Earth?", and my son answered, "My dad says it's because I swam the fastest." FML
Top comments
Verst 16
Even though your Mother isn't proud, you should be. Congratulations, OP.
Ambient25 25
you should tell your mom that you feel like such a "son of a bitch" and see if she gets it
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Comments (62)
FuKcMee 32
tell that hoe shit don't fall too far from the asshole
jsp16 24
That's when you throw her apple pie at her.
izzie321 27
Nice try.
ApollosMyth 22
Not really that great of a try.
Verst 16
Even though your Mother isn't proud, you should be. Congratulations, OP.
Redoxx_fml 22
Until you're cursed with bad luck for being number 13
melolune 9
That's not the main point. Besides, the number 13 is actually considered lucky in some cultures. Congrats OP :)
FuKcMee 32
your moms a ****, punch her in the face that will teach the bitch
Wizardo 34
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You know something tells me your mum isn't really happy with life, fix it by acting the same way she acts towards you that should do it... right?
Ambient25 25
you should tell your mom that you feel like such a "son of a bitch" and see if she gets it
Iostinparadise 1
Don't mind your mom. You did great OP! You have every reason to be very proud of yourself :)
Cazz91 21
Shit also stinks, especially with that attitude. She could have been a little more enthusiastic than that with her reaction. Way to go OP, congratulations!
Altar_fml 2
If you had Asian parents like me, 13 would be good enough for now - they'll expect a 12 or lower the next year or semester. Also, I am forced to play sports on the varsity level, and play the damn violin.
aimeegoldberg 22
as long as you do it well, it pays off :) good luck!
Geometric 18
Hey #12, like #14 said, it might seem annoying now, but extracurricular activities are what make the difference between being accepted into for example a residential college hall or not, at least in my country. They will benefit you in the future!! :)
RainbowDashie140 12
Not all shit floats, some sink. But not you OP! Congrats!