Today, I found out I was 13th in a graduating class of about 350 students. When I told my mother, without batting an eye, she told me, "Hey, shit floats". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I recently graduated from high school and I went to a college party. I met these girls and told them I graduated college already, to sound cool. I then heard one of them say, "I went to middle school with you, and I was in your math class." FML
Today, I tripped in front of my graduation class of 225 and all of their relatives while receiving my diploma. FML
Today, while at a grocery store, I told my mom I had some good news. She exclaimed, "You finally got a boyfriend?!" No mom, just an A on my math test. FML
Today, my school sent me an email saying I would be transferred to another class this Monday. I told my mom about it. Turns out my drunk mom ran into my teacher at a bar and started berating her for being at the bar, instead of grading her “kid’s exam already.” I’m a high school senior. FML
Today, while at school, a bra fell out of my coat. After the initial shock, people started congratulating me on finally getting a girlfriend. I didn't have the heart to tell them it was my mom's. FML
Today, I found out that, despite my above average performance in school, I was right in the middle of my class ranking at graduation. My school stated that your respect for others would affect your ranking, but the fact that nearly all of the people who placed above me were gigantic pricks says otherwise. FML
Today, my mom called and told me I got accepted to my first-choice college. I got really excited and asked her to read me the letter. As she started to read it, she said, "Oops... uh, nevermind." FML
Today, I found out that my mother has been seeing my maths teacher. I'm still failing his class. FML
Today, I found out my mom is the nude model for an art class at my college. FML
Today, I got a call from my 8-year-old's 3rd grade teacher. Apparently a question went around class asking, "Why do you think you were put on this Earth?", and my son answered, "My dad says it's because I swam the fastest." FML
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Top comments
Verst 16
Even though your Mother isn't proud, you should be. Congratulations, OP.
Ambient25 25
you should tell your mom that you feel like such a "son of a bitch" and see if she gets it
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Comments (62)
chuka81 27
Remind her of this day when you're putting her in an old people's home.
perdix 31
That's pretty good. Just think: If you didn't piss away so much time on FML, you might have made the Top Ten! Good thing there wasn't FML when I was in high school -- I'd probably be living in my parents' basement by now!
Nyx_fml 23
It's okay, perdix. I'm sure some people here think you live in your parents' basement anyway. :P
worldclassrager 41
That's good...my class was a total of twelve...so congrats...it's a good asset if you get my drift...
KingReppin956 15
Dude who the hell cares? You're going to college & shit bro, you got life locked down, i am lucky if I'm in the top 100.
WeeSherbetDab 10
think of it this way, no matter how bad you think you are, you can always come out on top
marinewife01 16
Hey, that's a great feat in this day and age among, well among the idiots that are graduating! Congrats kid! You've earned your 13th spot. Hopefully you know the difference between your and you're!
Yodelmeister 18
Hey, congrats on your achievement!
TogeBara 12
I was in advanced English Literature in high school at 11th grade (this was after I had been in a remedial course for having failed English in 9th grade), and my teacher started with a lecture of how improvement will show brighter than just being talented. He stood me up in the front of the class at the start, and ended the lecture with, "So as you can see, you are all turds in the punch bowl, but some of you are floaters, and some of you are sinkers. Congrats on becoming floaters." To this day, I am still not sure if we were insulted or complimented...
Zverina 20
I don't get what the big deal is. You come out sooner? So what?
TogeBara 12
OP finished in the top 20 of her graduating class, probably with honors. That is something to be proud of... if you can't see this then you are probably as bad as op's mom...
olpally 33
Wish I was in the top 300 of my class... Great job op!