Username
France
Today, I found out exactly what Ducolax stool softener is all about. Holy colon cleanse Batman! FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Rip it up and start again
Today, after fasting for 24 hours and drinking 2 buckets of laxatives, my doctor's office notified me that my colonoscopy had been cancelled. I'd just finished the prep by taking the fart pills, and now have the cleanest colon ever. A lot of time spent on the toilet that I’ll never get back though. FML
Anonymous
Out of the frying pan…
Today, after a five day bout of severe chronic constipation, I decided to get some orange juice and increase my water intake. The good news is that I'm no longer constipated. The bad news is that I've got diarrhea now. FML
sofakingweetodit
United States
Today, in preparation for a presentation at work, I decided to take a handful of vitamins to fight my cold. As I was putting the bottles away, I noticed one of them was a laxative. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, I read the instructions on my new prescription constipation medicine: "For best results, defecate before use." FML
CarrieBerrie
Fire in the hole!
Today, after being woken up with the intense urge to go to the bathroom, and having gone to the bathroom three times in the last hour, I finally realized I took two laxatives instead of two Midol. My ass is on fire. FML
Rob
France
Today, while on the crapper, I learned that morphine has a nasty side-effect. It appears that it can cause a massive rock-hard piece of dung the size of a bus to form in your intestines. I went to the doctor, he handed me a glove and some laxatives and said, "Have fun!" FML
Anonymous
The Gush
Today, I had planned to do a twenty-minute colon cleanse enema for weight loss. Instead, I woke up in the middle of the night with uncontrollable diarrhea that’s still going strong. Eight hours and counting. FML
Anonymous
United States
You need more fiber
Today, I finally got over having constipation for two days straight. It came in the form of a normal-sized, rock-hard turd that made me scream "Ow!" when it came out. FML
Maddie
Today, I had to take a dump in a box for a stool test. FML
jack
London, United Kingdom
Today, due to medication I am taking that causes constipation, I have become all too accustomed to using a disposable rubber glove to dig crap out of my own butthole. FML
Top comments
Person1233 13
What the ****?!?
Taipan_fml 0
I didn't know Batman used that. Huh. Learn sumthin new every day.
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Comments (138)
nikcolburn 0
Brave Sir Robin, Monty Python reference FTW
cboisen10 1
ydi for saying batman at the end of that fag
astro_plastic 0
You deserve a life of hell for not respecting The Batman. And for saying "fag".
Sekococo 0
XD thank you OP
ughpplppl 0
love the post, very funny!
trackrunner00008 0
dude what the **** does your fml even mean. fyl not because of what happened but because you seem like the guy who got kicked in the nuts all the time in high school cuz you use quotes from little kid tv shows
ipts 0
how stupid can u be for not knowing what stool softener is? it makes ur $h! soft and squishy. i swear theses people are... ug.
RayneWolf 10
omg that's lolz
GiddyXD 0
i dont get it
sabatical 0
as the old batman series has the popups *kablammo*!!!
J0gby 0
maybe you should read the lable im pretty sure it would say what it does