Today, I found dog poop in my room that had probably been there for days. My girlfriend, who was watching the house, said she didn't realize it was there, because she thought it was the smell of her own farts. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my roommate and I noticed a foul smell in our apartment. After looking around for a little while, I found that her cat had pooped on a pair of my jeans, and apparently tried to cover it up by dragging a shirt over the mess. FML
Today, I woke to the smell of poop in my apartment. I went to investigate and found out a cat had pooped in my living room. I don’t have a cat. FML
Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML
Today, I opened my front door to be greeted by what I can only describe as the stink of death. After moving furniture and lifting floorboards, frantically searching for whatever had died, I finally discovered the actual source of the stench - my girlfriend's feet. FML
Today, I was cleaning out the cabinets under my kitchen sink and I farted with such force that my dog thought someone was knocking at the door. FML
Today, I came home to the vilest stench I've ever smelled. I had to open a floor vent and scoop up the turd that was inside. Funnily enough, today was the day my scumbag roommate moved out, but I'm sure he had absolutely nothing to do with it. FML
Today, coming home, I discovered that my dog had left me a beautiful mound of poop in the middle of the corridor. He'd made an effort, though: there was a roll of shredded toilet paper next to it. FML
Today, I discovered my dog pooped in my bed, under the covers, by rolling over onto it. FML
Today, my roommate let his dog out. Not even five minutes later, she walked into my room and dropped a deuce. FML
Today, my girlfriend managed to trap a fart in her nightgown and carry it all the way from the bathroom, into our bedroom, and finally into our bed. FML
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Top comments
19990231 29
That is an impressive lady if the smell sticks around that long.
StickyPickles 33
I'd probably be a bit concerned if my farts smelled like dog shit. . That's just me though
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Comments (39)
asdadfhowrh 23
Apparently your gf's fart smell like dog poop :p
captainsmegma 12
That is one classy lady.
wickedhyype 17
LOL. If her farts smell that bad, i think you have s bigger problem than dog poop on your carpet. Get her some of that activia yogurt!
hipposteve 21
Kudos on her honesty
rshweky 17
She's a charmer
_imacooldude_ 10
That's disgusting. Get rid of her
mccrightp 29
When she told you that, did you rip her clothes off and roughly take her in a rising passion? Cuz, you know...(winks)
NineeCat 32
What the ****, dude?
mccrightp 29
I was being sarcastic about what turn on that would be to hear about.
Geckosrock99 33
Sounds like my boyfriend watching my iguana while I'm gone for a few days. When I get back, I find little dried up turds in random places and my boyfriend doesn't notice, unless it's on the bed. I usually have to clean it up.
SquirrelNutty 5
what a catch!
nikki151 21
Nice lady you got there