Today, I finally started my dream job. I turned up for work with a huge smile on my face. Imagine how much my face dropped when I saw that I had to share an office with the girl I stood up last weekend. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, after recently quitting a terrible job which made me miserable, I went to my first work meeting at my new job. I was excited to start fresh and meet my new coworkers. Instead, I met my boyfriend's extremely jealous ex-girlfriend. She didn't look excited to see me. FML
Today, I finally started my first job. I also lost it, for being too "enthusiastic" and making my fellow employees look lazy. FML
Today, I walked into my new office for the first time after receiving the promotion I've been trying for. Someone took a dump on my desk. FML
Not a good look
Today, my coworker and I agreed to come clean and tell our fellow employees that we have been secretly dating for a while. Before we could, I received a promotion. I'm now his boss. FML
My big day
Today, I was starting a new job. I got up early, showered, did my hair, put on my uniform, had a good cry because I was scared/excited that I was starting a future where I will be financially free for the first time. Then my boss texted me because one of his back of house employees is sick and he can’t train me until tomorrow. FML
Today, I start work in an office, with my mother. FML
Happy dance!
Today, after five years of working a soul-sucking dead end job, I was offered an amazing role in a new field. When the HR rep told me, I was so excited that I screamed at the top of my lungs, cheered like a maniac, and started laughing so hard I cried.I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm off my meds now. FML
Today, was my first day at a new job. I was really pleased with how much positive attention I was getting in a mainly male office. Guess whose shirt was see-through. FML
Today, I came to work ready to impress my boss. A couple of weeks ago I asked him for a promotion from stock to sales and I have been proving myself worthy. Turns out he hired a new girl for sales, with great, big, fake breasts. FML
Alexa, play "Boredom" by Buzzcocks
Today, I started the internship of my dreams. The company has nothing for me to do, so I sit and stare at the clock. FML
Top comments
Vanguard507 0
More like imagine how she feels. Just saying.
Optimus_Primerib 0
I hope she ***** your shit up you loser.
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Comments (247)
nerdsgetmehot 23
You're a bastard and karma is coming back to kick you in the balls. Have fun with that.
ckyorelse 18
karma only works towards the next life, not this one. get your facts straight before you ridicule someone
nerdsgetmehot 23
My apologizes, but I was only making a joke anyway. I'll try to keep my facts straight next time, but please lighten up and cut me some slack; I'm far from being an idiot, so don't assume that I am one.
dgr8ing 0
besides karma is a word with multiple meanings so get YOUR facts straight really it's just the reaction for bad stuff you have done many religions take it different ways but they all incorporate it, and Christianity has it THIS life, just it's not called karma.
gtwerd 0
ckyorelse-0 dgr8ing-1
ubetrwatchBN 5
I'd call it 'you reap what you sow' or some kind of universal reciprocity, but thats just me. For example, ckyorelse, you troll around fml bitching at ppl for their "improper" use of karma only to be corrected, yourself. Enlightening, isn't it? And Nerdsgetmehot, you're def not an idiot. I agree it's a ydi whether it's karma, the universe, or the tooth fairy.
mind_geek 15
The average office is pretty dangerous. Scissors, thumbtacks, staples, Plenty of nice sharp objects for karma, or the stood up girl to place in contact with his happy-sacks. Haha I said happy-sacks. OK I'm done now.
jess6blondie9 3
28 - Having a next life is a matter of what you believe, that doesn't make it a fact. So how about you get your facts straight before you decide to be rude to someone who's making a joke.
Jaxx66 21
clyorelse just has FML's he's to sad to put on here and is angry everyone else's life seems better.
ckyorelse 18
or I like to troll around. obviously none of you know what karma actually is so I will let you believe what you want, I'll be the only enlightened one on here, that's fine by me
VeganVampyre 27
Ckyorelse, you're a ******* dumbass and you're nowhere near being "enlightened" as far as I can tell. Karma, as well as having a next life, are concepts that are entirely dependent on what you choose to believe in. You can't just tell people they're wrong and have no idea what karma is like it's a fact; different people believe different things. For example, being Wiccan, I actually believe that there is no next life unless you choose it, and karma is something that comes back to you IN THIS LIFE to reward or punish you for your actions. So using your own so called logic, that makes you an idiot who doesn't know anything about what karma actually is, and I am clearly the only one here who is enlightened and knows anything. Have a nice day.
simply_improper 1
are you really that self absorbed that you couldnt take a min out of your day to call and cancel the date instead of standing her up? YDI for being an arrogant asshole
Zombieslayer1 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Hey, sometimes a guy gotta do what a guy gotta do.
CitrusGirl 0
Sometimes a guy gotta make a call and quit being a little bitch
RyanMacVey 17
wow dude... not a smart move
chino627 0
just tell her u didn't stand her up ur here now
klong91 7
YDI You do bad things to people, karma will get your ass.
bigbadtim 7
You know, nightmares are still dreams.
chemeesh 0
at least she's not your boss?
chino627 0
u make the best point
rukikiki 0
very true.
zowieandzander77 1
OP you are an idiot. are you that much of a coward that you couldn't make a 1 min phone call and cancel? furthermore if she works in your field you might actually have more in common than you think and probably would have had good conversation. I hope she makes you life hell!
mima77 0
Umm you kinda copied a recent post. Just saying...
zowieandzander77 1
um no I didn't... please tell me who else mentioned that if the OP had taken the time to get to know the girl they would have found out they work in the same office/ field???
CitrusGirl 0
Maybe you should think twice before you decide to be rude and inconsiderate toward other peoples plans.
solayback 0
talk about coincidence...small world may i add. -_-