Today, I finally reached the point where it became necessary to give my boyfriend an ultimatum: either clip your toenails, or we aren't having sex. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was about to have sex with my boyfriend when he reminded me that I needed to cut my toe nails. FML
Today, I had to finally give my boyfriend an ultimatum. Either he at least trims his giant mass of unruly pubes or no more sex. I feel I have no choice since his huge bush has left friction burns on my face and down below. He doesn’t see the problem. FML
Today, I walked into my bedroom to find my boyfriend clipping his toe nails into my pillow case. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was finally time for both of us to have sex with each other. He kept his shoes on the whole time because he thought he had smelly feet. FML
Today, I was about to go and take a shower when I saw a pair of scissors taped to the door at eye level with a note from my boyfriend saying "Time to trim that hairy thang down under." FML
Today, my husband and I got into a fight because I refused to let him use my fingernail to clean the plaque off his teeth. FML
Today, I had to beg and argue with my boyfriend to get him to take a shower and brush his teeth. This has become a recurring argument now we're confined together. FML
Today, I had to tell my 30 year-old boyfriend to take a shower, or else he won't for a week. FML
Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to tell me he couldn't take it anymore because my legs were too hairy. I shaved yesterday. FML
Today, I had to beg my boyfriend to get him to take a shower and brush his teeth. This is a basic weekly argument. FML
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Top comments
Lucario227 22
I'm extremely curious about what his choice was
haileyrows 26
He was really toeing the line, eh? Glad you finally put your foot down
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Comments (71)
Lucario227 22
I'm extremely curious about what his choice was
vikky538 29
I think his choice would be the first option.
shemademedoit 20
or so you thought. they probably haven't had sex for as long as his toenails are
yoursucklives 36
kinda sad that you have to do that. should be basic hygiene to clip your nails regularly!
Redoxx_fml 22
You can't boss Howard Hughes around like that
The_Avatar 22
Even though 5 hours is way too early to worry that shit can still be scary for women. Just let her know 5 hours isnt anything to worry about
Emmageen 14
Hum .... wrong FML ?
The_Avatar 22
Yeah i only feel slightly stupid haha
xmalachix 15
wrong FML dude.
devildog562 33
Wtf kind of sex are you having that toenails come into play ? Plus ultimatums always work so well. ... Next fml will he cheated on her
Emmageen 14
Should not be involved rather... that's kinda the problem I guess...
MrConcise 35
Either it's a foot fetish, or she just gets poked by his toes more than his manhood every night. Sex would simply be leverage.
Tarlachia 33
22, if that's the case that's some freakishly long toenails worthy of Ripley's Believe It Or Not Museum!
MrConcise 35
I don't mean during sex! I meant while asleep. Haha
Badkarma4u 17
Yeah using sex for leverage is always a bad idea. #5 is right if you try to use sex to control him a common reaction is to show you that you dont have a monopoly on it.
leogachi 15
What exactly is controlling about not wanting to get scratched up by his toe nails all the time?
Setareh23 34
If she's using sex as an irrelevant ultimatum, then yeah that's a bad thing. But if she's disgusted by his toe nails to the point that it literally becomes a "turn-off" for her, then it's only normal she shouldn't be forced into having sex with him when she doesn't want to. I am disgusted when people go 4+ days without showering, and would not want to sleep with someone who couldn't keep that minimum hygiene. If for her it's keeping toe nails clean, I see no reason why she should force herself to sleep with him while inwardly feeling disgusted and unhappy by every moment of it. Or (as people said) he might be scratching her with his toes. My toes get really sharp when they are too long, to the point that it causes bloody gashes in my feet sometimes (if I walk into the other by accident), or it easily leaves long scratch marks on my bf if my toes graze him. So yes, I make a point of cutting them as often as possible.
withered 30
It's more sad she needs to use sex so he takes care of personal hygene. If I would understand anything here it's that she breaks up with this child she's with now. How pathetic must you be that you need to have an ultimatum to take care of yourself?
haileyrows 26
He was really toeing the line, eh? Glad you finally put your foot down
wanted_2_want 40
Hopefully she did not step on his toenails while doing so. hahaha
Way2Fast8 20
She really nailed down the law
Emmageen 14
Exactly the same problem here, WTF with their toenails ??
The_Avatar 22
What guy would even hesitate ?!
khaoticpanda 28
Glad you found the right FML ;)
lulinator 40
Should never use sex as a bargaining tool.
lulinator 40
Totally agree. Nails the size of talons are narsty. I'm thankful my boyfriend wears socks most of the time because his are disgusting. But I just think no one should use sex to get what they want. Revoke something else like, not making supper anymore, or not doing his laundry, etc.
Badkarma4u 17
Soneone always ends up hurt.
DoomedGemini 38
I am getting the impression he's accidentally scratching her during sex. If that's not why then yeah that's bad, but if it is she shouldn't have to put up with being scratched
interesting33 37
It might be that they really turn her off and she doesn't want to have sex when they are that long, or that they scratch her and make it uncomfortable. But sounds like a bargaining situation from the fml
myoukei 31
Who is he, Struwwelpeter?